In My Own World

A New Chapter

2010-08-18T23:08:00.005-04:00

So, it has been more than a year since the last time I visited (contemplated) to blog. A lot of things had happened since then. I got married (November 14, 2009) and it was wonderful wedding. Although my sister could not make it.... My dad made it up by holding a small reception at Sonya's Garden in Tagaytay. Friends and families who could not make it, was able to share our special day during the reception. Horacio and I are truly blessed. We are deeply thankful to God. I also found myself in a cake decorating class. Something that I had been wanting to do for quite a while now, but never got the chance (or the time) to do so.

Now, I start this blog not to (only) digress in the past, but also to let the blogsphere (and soon to be followers... hopefully) about the new challenge that I have taken upon in my life.

I joined and will be running a 13.1 mile marathon on December 5, 2010.

Yes, I will be running. For those who know me well, knows that me and the gym does not go on the same sentence. At first, it was more for a personal benefit - cardio, tone my body, get more active. Then I went to the meeting to register, and I was just inspired. By the way, I am running with Team Challenge to help raise funds for Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America. The "speaker" told us about the runners who participate have Crohn's or ulcerative disease and they run half marathon after half marathon. I looked at myself - here I am healthy as I could be, yet I have done nothing. Sure, I am a nurse and I help people each day... but for some reason, having that as a job does not really count. I get paid to help them. It is my job.

So, thankful that I got talked into attending the meeting (I also got a friend to join), I signed up right then and there.

Here I am now, few hours after my first two mile run (actually it was just 1.8 mile according to our team coach). It was a challenge. But I finished it without throwing up, fainting or sitting down to take a breather! I also finished it under 30 minutes - which at first I thought would be impossible. But yes, I am proud of myself to have finished it and am looking forward to build up my endurance and run more miles. Each mile I run, I dedicate to the cause.

Have I mentioned that this was a fundraiser? Yep, it is. Your donation to the cause will be greatly appreciated, and remember, this is a tax deductable donation! If you wish to donate simply visit: www.active.com/donate/lv10nyc/LVJOn g. Eighty cents of each dollar you donate goes directly to Crohn's and Colitis Foundation of America to find cure and improve the quality of life of children and adults suffering this disease. Approximately 1.4 million American children and adults are diagnosed with crohn's and ulcerative colitis, and more are suffering in silence.

Again, thanks for your support!!

utmost compliment?

2009-06-24T18:33:00.003-04:00

as i was taking care of a patient, i had to step out of the room to grab something quickly. as i came back to the room...

patient's daughter: my mom had just paid you the utmost compliment.
me: huh? (smiles at her and her mom)
patient's daughter: she said that you are most kind, you must be Jewish!
me: oh... (smiles and attends to patient) thank you, but i am not Jewish.

Family Affair

2009-06-24T18:08:00.002-04:00

as nurses, we tend to be so nosy. we try (or tend) to find out patient's family affairs, even without trying. sure, there is that routine question "who is your support system?" "who do you live with?" "who takes care of you?" but it's interesting when a patient has been in the hospital for quite sometime, it seems like that's all that it takes to uncover the skeletons in their closets.

but, it's not only patients that we tend to know their personal lives, as nurses working with other nurses, seeing how they care and/or react to certain patient's familial care decisions shows who they are and what they truly believe in.

just one of the experiences that i had in the unit, as i was giving my report to the oncoming nurse.

nurse 1: (after hearing patient's name) she's still here? wow...
me: yep, awaiting placement.
nurse 1: really?? what's taking them so long?
me: well, patient has *these things* that i guess is making it harder for her to be placed.
nurse 1: did you know that she has five kids? and none of them would/could take her in.
me: five kids?? really?
nurse 1: yep, they even offered 24/7 home care, but they still refused. can you believe that?
me: yeah.. that's a shame...
nurse 2: (butts in) but you guys don't know who she was in the past. she might not have treated her kids right in the beginning.
nurse 1: true..
me: i guess so.. but is that reason enough?
nurse 2: well, my mother always told me that it is not my responsibility to take care of her. she always say that people have kids because they want them not because they need someone to take care of them when they grow old.
nurse 1: interesting..
nurse 2: it's true. you don't owe them anything. you don't have to take care of them. they are self-sufficient. they brought you up to be self-sufficient.

... just remembering this dialogue upsets me... it's a whole lot of wrong in what nurse 2 had voiced. i remember just thinking to myself "God bless you." that was all i could say. it was just all wrong. then maybe, i was just brought up differently, believes and cares a whole lot differently.

from my kitchen to..

2009-05-25T08:20:00.002-04:00

...yours! (as paula deen would have said). i have been on a roll this past weeks. i have been making so food from my kitchen that is so totally diverse. just this past week alone, i had made italian (spaghetti with spicy red bellpeppers), filipino (pinakbet, chicken marinated in mama sita bbq), chinese (chicken sauteed with some veggies), and indian (chicken curry) food. to top it, i had made my first brownies from scratch and a banana bread!

mind you, i am not a great cook. i can cook, yes, but great - not at all! someone had said a great cook need not a recipe to follow. i mean, i can cook without a recipe, the results could be unpredictable. i really don't know where the passion of making food comes from, but as what my sister had told me "it's in our genes." i guess, she is right... from both sides of my family, food has been a center of everything. we love to gather around the table and just enjoy a great meal and conversation. should i say, the family that eats together, stays together?

i used to remember Ammah (my grandma from my dad's side) would always be in the kitchen making something.. from the peanuts that she would roast and later sell to great chinese food that (i believe) she had learned to make from her parents for us to feast on. too bad, she would usually kick my and my cousin out of the kitchen in fear of us spilling stuff onto ourselves and burn ourselves! it would have been great to have learned how she made all those food that i now still crave for and pass it along my kids.

in the baking arena, i remember my aunt (from my mom's side) would let us lick the batter off the spatula or the mixer attachments after she was done with it! and those times when my cousin and i would sneak into her pantry and eat the candy sprinkles from the jar! the best part of the baking experience that i had as a child was when my cousin (dad's side) would make this fruit cake for christmas. the whole place would just smell of tha rum, fruits and nuts! i could smell it until now.. unfortunately, the recipe is a top secret that i just can't seem to get a hold of!

i could see why people would instantly think that i would love to become a chef for a day, but then again, why would i want to be one if i could always enjoy making things from my kitchen? i just get a nice feeling whenever i see people enjoying the food that i make, and it doesn't hurt to have someone that is more than willing to try the (new) foods that i create!

so, it's been a while...!

2009-05-05T23:56:00.003-04:00

wow... time really flies when you are having fun! hehehe

it seems like this blog (and the triumverate's) has been quiet for quite a long time.. no wonder mom has been pestering us on writing about something, anything! well, mom, here you go!

i really don't have anything in mind right now, just the usual random stuff... so... here goes..

wedding plans! well, well, well... that has been on people's lips each time they see me.. it seems like they think of it more that i do! hehehe i can't believe we only have six more months to go!!! although we pretty much have covered most essentials and just the minor details are needed to be taken care of... thank God i haven't been a bridezilla... yet! yes, i must admit i do have my moments of panick attacks, but thank God for horacio and my sister -- they just know how to calm those nerves!!

whenever i think about the things that i/we want for the wedding, it seems so "untraditional". i guess the main thing that we really want is to celebrate this very special day with (close) family and friends... we don't like those awkward "thank you for coming! (who are you??)" kinda thing... i still find it weird when people just invite themselves or assumes that we are going to invite someone whom we haven't seen (and kept in touch with) for like ten years, have met like once in our entire lives, or simply haven't met at all! i am touched that you would like to be a part of our wedding... but, really?? then there are those people who questions and challenges you abou the things how you want your wedding to be like! again, i understand you want to be a part of the wedding planning and all.. but hey, it's my wedding, it's what i want that matters most! hehehe oh my... i just sounded like a bridezilla! :)

moving on...

though it does may sound like wedding is all that i have in my head for some people... i actually have a life. and that life has been dampened by my (stupid) shift. yes, i know, i had asked for it.. and now regretting and suffering tremendously. don't get me wrong, i love my job right now. i am enjoying the new things that i am learning, i enjoy the fact that i don't get stuck doing "administrative" things anymore... i actually see my patients, assess them and be able to hold their hand even for half a minute! it has been crazy, though we have been experiencing low patient ratio lately, which could be seen as a blessing yet also could be scary. scary because i could get used to the three patients a night and wouldn't know what i would do with myself if faced with more than that! blessing, since we could actually request to be off on a specific day if we wanted to instead of floating to another unit... basically staffing the other units! (i think i just digressed from my point..). so, yeah, the night shift... i have put in my request to switch to days (even if it meant busier and stressful shift and lesser income) for a couple of reasons... i actually want to be awake during the times that people are up. instead of being awake at the middle of the night, bored with nothing to do (which usually ends up with me baking...)... and i miss spending time with my hunny... and others. hehehe it's just hard to plan things with family and friends.... i'm always sleeping or have to sleep.. although, i have been staying up even after my shift on my day off (confused? let's just say, if i'm working tonight and off the next, i come home and stay up all day... resulting to being up for about more than 26 hours) it has been working out well... sleep deprived? yes, but hey, it's so worth it.. i get some stuff done!

speaking of getting things done... there are so many things that are left undone for me! i have like a month's worth of photos in my camera that needs to be uploaded, there are books that i have to list down and start to give away (to clear out clutter), there are knick-knacks that i have to put together for my sister... and the list could just go on! why haven't i accomplished these? i really don't have a clue. it just seems like on each day that i am off, something comes up, plans are made, other things that are pending needs immediate attention, i simply get distracted... and there are the days that all i want to do is - nothing. just veg out in the couch, watch my shows... sleep. which, i guess goes back to the fact that my body clock is just so messed up that it confuses my entire system!

then there's church. i am just so happy. and i am not just saying this just because... i actually am in a happy place right now. despite the sleep deprivation and physical and mental exhaustion... i know i am still healthy (haven't gotten the flu this season, so far! just minor throat problems) and am able to serve the Lord. let me digress a bit.... during the days when horacio was trying to introduce me to his church, one of things that i like (now, but felt really weird about before) is the fellowship in the church. people in the church knows each other! i admit, it had became one of the factor why i chose the path i am on right now. the other reason, the main reason, being that i actually sit down during service and listen to the pastor preach (well... maybe there were days that i fell asleep - again, due to my sleep deprivation!). i learn things from what pastor j has been preaching. i know that in Catholic church they do sermon and read from the bible as well.. and am sure that if only i listened more and paid more attention i would actually understand what the priest would be talking about... but it just wasn't the same for me. i still sometimes wonder if i have actually pushed myself and be more active in (Catholic church) would i be in the same place as i am now? then again, God knows what He's doing. He had laid out the plans for me long before i knew there was one! i just learned to trust God more and be simply thankful for the path that He had laid out on me. i am still growing, learning... and i will stumble, but the force is there.

right now, although i am enjoying each moment of my life, i simply can't wait for november 15. yes, november15... i can't wait to be married and start the new chapter in my life with horacio. i know trials won't end and will keep coming... just as long as we have faith in each other and in God... things will just be alright.

anyways... this sleep deprived girl needs to squeeze in some snooze time before the sun rises... more things in the to-do list needs to be crossed out! until then... :)

Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

par-tay!

2009-02-22T04:10:00.002-05:00

so... i have gone and back from a week and a half of vacation. it was a pretty good timing that i have requested the vacation days... actually had made a mistake of requesting, was supposed to request the following week! but, as always, God had planned for it.. and things worked out well.

mom had requested for a birthday party, and a party she got. after about a week planning, her party came out as a success. i decorated the place with banner and red balloons, i made sure the curtains matched - red! everything was just red... hehehe the food was abundant... enough to fill the guests and then some to take home with them. mom had her cupcakes and birthday cakes. after the party and reflecting on it, i'm surprised at myself for being able to pull everything off. of course, it wouldn't be possible without the help of my family and horacio... :)

next thing on the calendar: may faith's baby shower! it's gonna be my second time to plan a baby shower, this time for it's gonna be a baby girl!! pink and yellow, here we come! :) i'm both excited and unsure on how to play about this shower. most of the guests wouldn't be the people that i really know... unlike the previous baby shower i threw (for mommy chi!). but, i just hope i would be able to fix the place up nicely and coordinate things with manang bing. now.. how will my cupcakes look like this time... :)

wedding-mania

2009-02-10T02:12:00.004-05:00

ok, it's almost 2:15 in the morning and have to be up by 7:30 to meet up with my cousin, but i just have to blog about this.

am actually over this topic, over being annoyed and irritated. now, i just find it amusingly embarassing, not for myself but for these people!

let me digress... when my sister and i had started to talk about the wedding and what it entails, she didn't fail to remind me over and over again that there would be a lot of stressors, stressors that i really could just block and could never be avoided (i.e.: mom trying to take over the planning.. etc.). i must say, mom has been good with inviting people and had kept to her limit (thanks mother!).

then.. there's the others! i got a call from my aunt, a voicemail actually and it went like this: "jen, pinadalhan mo daw sila ____ at ____ ng invitations, pero hindi mo daw napadalhan si ____. siya lang daw ang hindi nakatanggap. padalhan mo daw siya name is _____ address, same address as (the other relatives)." ["jen, you sent invites to ___ and ___, but you forgot to send _____ one. send him one, his name is _____, same address as the (other relatives)."] horacio must have seen the look on my face. i was totally annoyed! i mean, the guest list was mainly those people that horacio and i know personally, since we were on a budget and all as well. then this guy just "requested" to be invited. his now doesn't ring a bell, i don't having a conversation with him or meeting him for that matter! then my mom calls, i asked if she knew this person. she told me yes, and the story gets more interesting! apparently, the "main" person and reason why i included them on the guestlist wouldn't be able to make it due to her situation... and had told this guy to attend on her behalf. the guy was glad to accept the offer and asked "sino ba ang sa atin, ang babae o lalake?" i was just speechless. i didn't know how to react! i mean, here he was saddened by the fact that i didn't send him an invite (save the date), yet he doesn't even know who was getting married! the nerve, right?? so i told horacio the "continuation" of the story and he couldn't stop laughing! it's just so... you think of the word to perfectly describe this!

then mom's story continues.... she spoke to one of her relatives. she mentioned that they have received the save the dates and that some other relatives (who i maybe have met when i was....) are staying with them and told my mom to tell me to send them invites too!! take note.. relativeS! mom told them she wouldn't ask me to do so (thank you so much mom!!). but, guess what? this person had insisted my mom to ask me, since she is the "mother". then she continues on asking if i had invited one of my aunts... mom just replied "i think so." i mean, who are they and why do they care so much who i invite and don't??? i mean, their kids had gotten married in the past years and did my mom tell them to invite pontious pilate??

i was so furious when i heard these stories, and i could just hear my sister: there are more things to come, this is just the beginning. i'm really over in by now, well.. maybe a bit irritated still. but who wouldn't be? i guess, i should be flattered... after all, they all want (and begging??) to be invited to my big day after all! hehe

communication

2009-02-05T00:08:00.001-05:00

This is a big thing, or should I call it – struggle for me. Yes, I know, I have cellphone, fully aware of it and it only takes a button or two to call someone. Ever since, I have not been a big on calling other people. I’d rather text than call. I mean, I do call. I call people whenever I have to meet them and let them know I’m running late or to find out where exactly they are at. And most of the time, I screen my calls – but that doesn’t necessarily mean that I always ignore your call. I always have the habit to put my cellphone on silent mode or vibrate, especially when going to work, and forget to put it back on ‘normal’ mode – which the other reason why most of the time I don’t know when people have been trying to get in touch with me. There are also days, when I wouldn’t know where I last placed my phone, and wouldn’t be bothered really looking for it – until people start calling horacio just to find out my whereabouts and if I’m ok. I just, am not that attached to my phone. Yes, I bring it around with me when I go out… and I do find it necessary to have (I have gone a day without one while I was out, and I felt like an idiot having to ask someone if I could use their phone!). But I’m just not someone who would sit down and pick up my phone and call other people to “chat”. I would rather hang-out with you and chat with you in person. Hence, I lose touch with people. See, if I don’t call you, how am I supposed to plan something and meet up with you? So, I realized that I am the type of person who are friends with a lot of people, and keeps friends who you don’t necessarily have to talk to every day and discuss every single detail of your life. I have a friend in college, we used to meet up like once a year (until she got married, moved back to Philippines, and now lives in texas…) and that was enough for us. we kept our friendship, we know what’s going on with each other’s lives. We don’t always call each other as well, we usually play phone tags (see, if you call me and leave me a message, I will call you back) but when we do catch each other, we would be on the phone for like hours!

I also realized that the best way for me to keep in touch with people is through email. I guess, writing for me is some kind of therapy. I would rather write my feelings than say it out loud. Since Sunday school began (again) in January, we were “assigned” to a prayer partner. Meaning, we had to call each other and talk about how each other was doing, create a relationship outside the class. At first, I knew it was going to be a struggle for me… just the words ‘call each other’, I knew I was going to disappoint my prayer partner(s). I was honest with them though, I told them I’m not a big phone person, and having the schedule that I have, it would also be near to impossibility to catch me on “normal” hours. So, we decided to communicate via email, and I find myself being able to respond more, communicate more.. I don’t know if it’s just because I was doing it more because it’s according to my own time and my own convenience. As I was responding to an email, I was thinking, I could have just called her and told these things to her myself… then again, the other reason why I don’t like calling – time. Yes, I may be free right now… but how about the other party? Sometimes, I feel like I’m taking much of their time or I could be in a middle of a thought and something would distract me or miss out on something. I don’t know. I’m just ADD like that.

On the other hand, maybe I just am not a big fan of picking up the phone and calling people because I grew up without a phone. Growing up my friends and I met in school, hang out, planned things, visit one another at our abode. The day that a phone was installed at our place, I was excited, I finally could call friends!! But that didn’t last too long… I would rather wait until I see them and talk to them and share things with them.

Call me a bad daughter, sister, friend, but this is just me. It’s a struggle, I know, but if you really want to talk to me, call me and leave me a message. If I don’t call you back, call me again or better, email me. I just hope people would understand and not think I am simply ignoring them.

ramblings...

2009-01-31T06:46:00.001-05:00

It’s been a while since I have last updated. A really long while… nope, I have no other excuses but lack of time or maybe just lack of energy…

A lot of things have had happened for the past couple of weeks… since my last update. Time really does flies so fast, I had just remembered celebrating New Year, and now it’s February! We got at least 9 months to go until the BIG day! Wow… NINE MONTHS! I can’t believe this! As I was described once on how I am approaching this wedding planning… very relaxed. I guess I am too relaxed that the rest of the save the dates are still sitting here at home! No, I am not trying to procrastinate, or having second thoughts about things… it’s just that, I was hoping to get all the guests’ mailing address so that I could just send them out all at once… but of course, things happen… people happen… life happens…and I have now resolved to just send them out, in batches! So, today, that’s my goal, put stamps in them and mail them out!

Then of course there’s this thing that I’m planning for my entourage (bridesmaids and groomsmen only) that I have been trying to work on… but each time I get the chance to sit down and work on it… something about it is just amiss and I couldn’t get myself to continue with it… will now have to ask my brother to re-edit the layout (just minor change! Sorry!!). I guess too much for me being relaxed? Actually, I really don’t know if I am relaxed about the whole planning or not… maybe it’s just because we got most of the major things out of the way (reception, ceremony, dj, entourage list)… so, yeah… I am considering the limo, hotel, florist and dresses to be minor ones… hehehe

So far, January has proven to be a bit trying – both personal and work wise. Like I have said a couple times, I am trying. I’m trying to be a better person. I’m trying to walk in the light of the Lord. There are days though, when I couldn’t help but utter words that isn’t nice. When I tend to judge people especially when they get into my nerves… when they say certain things when certain people are around, yet act a different way when that person isn’t around. I know I may not make sense to most of you… but am sure a couple of you get my drift. It’s just hard whenever you try, only to be disappointed or know that they will never see that you are indeed trying… everything in life is a two-way street my friend, the other party should also try… but that’s the bad thing, the other party (I think!) is not willing to try!! But, whatever… like I said…I am trying my hardest. I don’t really plan to expect anything but recognition, I guess.

Work wise… the unit has been a chaos… one day we were general medicine unit, the next day a surge of cardio-vascular patients… then now we are back on general medicine only to for the floor to welcome us with cardio-vascular-thoracic step down patients!! I said welcome, because right now, after the fire episode last week, they had to kick us out from our unit and make it into a “swing” unit to make way for other units to be thoroughly cleaned. So, for the next six weeks we will be all over the hospital… half of us would be in the unit opened just for us (to accept medicine patients) and the other half of the staff would be doing orientation at the cardiac-vascular and maybe intensive care units. I mean, I guess it works out for the better… we get more time to get oriented and learn more about these kind of patients, the protocols… it’s a good growth experience. Like the cardiac nursing director had said “we could see this as glass half empty and glass half full.” I am TRYING to see it as glass half full. And of course… there’s the transition for me to go to days! Yes, I have finally made up mind earlier on the month of January and spoke to our manager. I didn’t know that the transition would be happening soon (March!) but since, a couple of nurses are leaving for other units… the opening is just there to be filled in. I am looking forward to this. Finally, normalcy in my body clock! Or so I hope!!!

This month as well… I have (with horacio) taken a step forward in my walk with Christ. We got baptized on the 25th of January! I have been thinking about getting baptized… and ever since we had spoken to the pastor (who will be marrying us)… I know I want God to be the center of our relationship. I know that there is no stronger foundation but God. Not only that, I personally feel so blessed that I am slowly getting to know Christ better. Learning of His words and understanding them. And because of this, I was able to reach out to a patient and lift him up. One thing is helping patients and making sure they are comfortable…. There’s another thing knowing that you personally lifted their spirits up with words of Christ. I saw the same patient again after few weeks of being discharged (he was back on the unit) and he had told me how thankful he is that I was able to speak to him the way I did, how much I have helped him… it was a nice feeling, but of course, as I told the patient… thank God for making me a vessel.

2009 had just begun… and there are so much things that had happened… these are some of the thoughts that are hovering around me… so… I just pray that as the days come, I pray for strength, patience and understanding. I just feel so blessed and grateful to the Lord. For always keeping me and seeing me through.

Oh, before i go…. Jollibee in woodside is opening on valentine’s day!! Or so I heard… J I can’t wait for this!! I can’t wait to taste that langhap sarap chicken joy once more… unfortunately, I was told that they wouldn’t be serving jolly hotdogs… boo!!!

Merry Christmas!!!

2008-12-21T23:00:00.001-05:00

Crazy Two Days!

2008-12-19T07:56:00.002-05:00

yup, just as the title said.. it has been crazy for the past two days for me! well, for the month so far...

since the year is about to end, and we have 11 months to go for the wedding, i decided to try and finalize a couple more things before the end of the year. so far we have booked our reception, videographer and photographer and that's it. even our entourage isn't finalized yet!

anyhoo... i decided that since horacio and i have totally different schedules and i have to try (so hard) not to sleep all day long on the days that i am off.. to schedule seeing vendors even on the days after i work.. (get my drift?) the only thing was that i told horacio that he would be driving in silence, since i would probably be asleep most of the drive! and that eh would have to make sure i am well fed. (hehe)

so, on wednesday, the 17th, as soon as i got home from work, horacio and i got ourselves ready to head out to long island to see a jeweler that customizes rings. our appointment was at noon, i got home around 8:45... as i said, i had to be well fed... we stopped by ihop first to have a hearty breakfast and were on our way to the jeweler by 11:30. we met with the owner of the place herself... talked about possibly changing the setting of my (engagement) ring, which i then realized i had a hard time parting with it and that i had this sinking feeling know that they would be "harming" my ring. so, i guess, we had to scratch that idea! then we proceeded on talking about wedding bands.. i now know what i like for me! but we didn't purchase anything yet. she told us to come back next year, to look aorund for other places just to be sure that we are really comfortable and really know what we want. it was a good consultation, since we were really able to sit down with someone and talk about rings in more details and weren't rush. the place is only by appointment, they don't accept walk-ins (which i think says a lot about the store - plus, they have been in business for more than 20 years and have had the same policy since day one).

after the jeweler, horacio and i headed out for our next destination - a dj company. we were early for our appointment and the location of the dj was just a walk away from woodbury commons (no, not the same one in jersey). we saw a sale sign on the banana republic window and thought.. let's just check it out to kill time. since we both knew that we are on a tight budget and that BR prices even on sale are still something that we would think twice spending on. were we wrong! we left the store with a dress, a blouse and a bag for me and some dress shirts for horacio! the sale was so great that we couldn't resist! we got our stuff from the sale rack plus we got $50 off on every $125 that you purchase!!! basically, i got a $250 bag for merely $70!!!

back on the dj hunt... we met with the guy... he showed us a video of what they do and all... the company is great and all, very professional. yet, the price was something that we really had to think about. besides, they were the first dj company that we have met... we have planned to see two more. so, we left the place, liking them, having them as a good candidate for the wedding.

then it was time for us to head back home... get ourselves ready for WINTUK!! yep! horacio got us tickets from the hospital (for a discounted price)... again, i fell asleep on the drive back home, giving me a total of at least 1 hour of sleep! thank God i wasn't that grouchy though but i still wasn't in the greatest mood. and didn't really feel like talking...

anyways, we got ready for wintuk and left the house by 6:30... wintuk was amazing! too bad we couldn't take pictures though.. but i was gutsy enough to take at one shot by the end of the show!!

then we headed straight home, ordered some chinese food... and when we are about to hit the hay, we realized that the gifts for his family needed to be wrapped since we were gonna pass by the following day. so, i stayed up until about one, wrapping gifts and all and went to bed (finally!).

then the morning came, i woke up at around 6am... tried to go back to sleep... but couldn't! so i just decided to get up, bake the dough that was sitting on the fridge so we could bring them to horacio's family. we had three appointments for the day. by 9, horacio and i were rushing to leave for our 10am appointment with a pastor in long island. we had mickey ds for breakie, drive-thru! i was up all the way throughout the way. we got to the church about half an hour late... which, i think, the pastor didn't mind. the church was nice, it was something that horacio and i just had in mind. after which, horacio and I headed out to check-out yet another dj company.

The dj company was great, the price was just (about) right… so we booked the dj right then and there. It may seem like a hasty decision, but the deal that we got was just so good.

After booking the dj and placing our deposit… we had time to kill until our next appointment. Since we were nearby and love their food.. horacio and I decided to have lunch at the cheesecake factory! It was a really great meal! We had the chicken thai wraps, I had their very sumptuous shrimp scampi and horacio had their tons of fun burger – which didn’t leave any room for dessert!

As soon as we pulled out the parking lot for our next destination, I got myself comfy underneath the blanket, and fell asleep almost immediately. Horacio woke me up, for he wasn’t sure the name of the church that we were looking for… the gps gave us a different location and we ended up by a school… good thing the church was just about four blocks away… and we didn’t get lost by much. The pastor confirmed with us that a lot of people make the same mistake, hence the 15 minute tardiness! The church was nice… but it had some elements that I didn’t like. After chatting with the pastor, he recommended another church that was located couple of minutes away. He gave us directions, and horacio and I decided to check it out as well.

As soon as we got to the church, we fell in love with the place. The church itself was nice. Unfortunately there was no one that we could talk to about having a possible wedding ceremony there… so, hopefully they are open to having a wedding with an outside pastor officiating the wedding.

After that, horacio drove around while I slept… then we headed towards his parent’s place. Where, embarrassingly enough, I fell asleep on their couch… thank God horacio’s family understood why I was falling asleep!

It was indeed a very long two-days for me… but thank God that I am ok and that we were able to do and cross out some of the things off our list. I wouldn’t recommend other people to do what I did… but I sure wouldn’t mind doing it again. If it means not losing a day, and be more productive… or maybe I should really just switch my shift at work?

days vs. nights

2008-12-12T04:22:00.002-05:00

so here i am... been on nights for a good month already. i like it, i adjusted well.... it has it's crazy moments... especially between the hours of 8pm and 11pm. after that, things starts to quiet down (unless you have those severely sundowning patients and severely confused, demented patients!). i still stay awake for the whole 12-hours that i am in... i like nights. i like it for i know it gets busy, yet it quiets down after a while, you get the chance to catch up with whatever it is you have to do. the textbook nurse that has the time to speak to patient and hear what they have on their chest, the "therapeautic communication" as the called it... i actually was able to apply it on nights... after working on the field for about 2 years now, i actually was able to stay in a patient's room for a good 10 minutes and talk to him. today, he just told me that that night we talk was the first night he slept happy. it just feels so rewarding! i finally get it when God said that we meet people for a reason. that each one of them will bring something in our lives. and i believe that i was that person for him.

on the downside... i have been feeling the exhaustion... i have been losing days wherein i just sleep through it and will be up all night even on my day off.. which is so unproductive of me. am so sluggish! on the days that i am off, i have to force myself to stay awake and be away from my bed... but then, after a 12-hour shift, all i long for is the bed... don't get me wrong, i could stay awake as long as am doing something and someone is next to me helping me stay awake! but it's just hard... i would be actually be awake for more than 24-hours!! sometimes, i miss the busy-ness of days.. of not being able to sit down, being stressed out... coz i know that's what keeps me on my toes. i know that i am being productive, instead of sitting here waiting for time to come for the next medication or to just find something to do as to not fall asleep.

i miss spending time with horacio (i miss going to and coming home from work with him or have lunch together)... i want to make plans to see family and friends... i actually kinda owe the kids hang-out time... haven't called or spoken to my mom since i don't know when... and i still have to fix my place up and ready it for christmas... there's just so many things to do that my sluggish self is just too sluggish. maybe i would switch to days... but then, there goes the therapeautic nurse that i could be on nights.... *sigh*

what to do...

2008-11-18T04:30:00.002-05:00

currently at work right now... it's been good. had two admissions... couple meds to be given out... all of my patients are in deep sleep as of now. so sad that the computer people had finally gotten around facebook and blocked it (first it was just friendster.. now facebook too!). so.. i'm bored... no fluff friends to race, feed or pet... no updating of status message on facebook... what to do... i could only put as much brain diarrhea here as i can... i'm just getting a bit sleepy... but i don't want to give in. i want to stay awake.

****************************

so many things going on now in my life... sometimes i don't know where to begin... i just pray that He would give me clarity of mind and lead me to the right path. i think He is trying to open new doors for me, at least letting me take a peak on it... yet, i'm still too coward to face them. but i know when the right time comes, things will happen all according to His great plan.

****************************

Christmas is just around the corner... horacio had been saying that my gift has already been purchased! i have just been spitting out things that i want to receive... wonder what he got me... i still don't know what to get him though! i'm always last minute... well, he tells me the last minute too!! anyways.. if someone else out there is wondering what i want this christmas... here's a list (for now!):

1. kindle from amazon - for some reason being able to read a book through this just tickles my fancy.. i know sis the "fresh book smell" isn't there... am not that avid reader. besides, think about it.. i would be saving how many trees in the process! go green!!

2. wireless earphones - i have been wishing for this one.. i didn't know it exists until a friend pointed out to me that it was on a movie (i forgot the title and i forgot the actor!).

3. laptop - i want one. actually, planning on getting one myself... but if someone would be generous enough, at least give me some funds! i want to replace the bulky desktop computer at home.. i want something that is really good, with external memory for my pictures and itunes. i want to be able to bring this with me whenever i go on a vacation, instead of constantly worrying if i have enough memory on my card!

4. a nice spa package... i need one. i miss being pampered...

5. a trip somewhere (honeymoon not counted!). anywhere except within the tri-state area! i want to go away again... need to go away.

anyhoo... i have to go and check up on my patients... got.to.stay.awake.

2008-11-17T01:51:00.001-05:00

so.. less than a year to go and i'll be marching down the aisle. although we haven't done anything much since meeting with the wedding planner. the main reason being that horacio and i had just started a new job at a new hospital and obtaining a schedule from them (horacio's schedule) is a bit hard (i think they haven't figured out who wuill precept him), but hopefully by december we'll have the ball rolling once more.
anyhoo... since planning for something that would involve more than 2 people isn't really horacio's cup of tea.. i have delegated him the task of choosing a place for our honeymoon. yes, we are already choosing a destination. my uncle is actually "giving" us the honeymoon as our gift (isn't that great??). we thought choosing a destination would be easy, since we could actually go anywhere we want.. it's not that easy.
we thought of the caribbeans... then fiji.. then thailand... then.... the list goes on. we both have realized that we are the type to enjoy a vacation more if we were to do more activities... we get bored easy.
so... now... although he's planning (deciding) on it.. we are both discussing it.
on a different note, i can't wait to try on wedding dresses!!! i think i would start crying when i put one on!! i've been so sappy lately... i don't know who to take me when i try on dresses... it really sucks my sister can't be here right now.. mom's taste is unpredictable... i don't want my bridesmaids or friends to see me in the dress before the wedding.. i can't take horacio with me... can i just hire someone who does this for a living? i don't know... maybe i'll break my own rules and bring a friend... maybe i'd go alone! ha!!

i'm rambling yet again.. just excited!! can't believe it's almost here!!!!!

is the grass really greener on the other side?

2008-10-30T22:21:00.002-04:00

During my going away surprise party at elmhurst, a supervisor told me that sometimes the grass is not greener on the other side of the fence. I just smiled and replied a non-committal reply.

It’s been almost two months since I have started in the new hospital. The unit is not what I thought it would be… during the interview they said it was a geriatric-telemetry floor (just like the one I worked for), but it turned out it was a general medicine floor which used to be a geriatric unit. There are no signs of telemetry at all. This was fine with me, a general medicine floor means I get a broader scope of patients and not just the usual chest pain and syncope and collapse patients.

The first few weeks, I could not stop seeing the differences on how nurses are in my unit. Though responsibilities are greater; they are actually doing nursing care. They knew the plan for the patients, they knew why the patients are still there, the nurses gets to say “hey, this patient’s stable, he can go home. What’s keeping him?” or tell the oncoming nurse “this patient is still here because he needs home care and he has no insurance.” Stuff like that… during hand-off communication we actually tell the nurses what happened to the patient during our shift… and not say “I don’t know, I was busy. You think I have time for this?” or “I can’t give this med, it was not ordered during my time.” The professionalism is there, somehow.

As days goes by, staffing became tough. People were calling in sick and the admin claim that they are on a budget cut and can’t have people do overtime. Staff were stressed out, they vent on each other… it was just horror. On that day, the clinical coordinator came up to me and apologized, well not only her… so did a couple of other nurses. I wondered why they were apologizing… I totally understood where they were coming from and why they reacted the way they did. I used to see this kind of drama every single day, at the beginning, middle and end of the shift.

The 12-hour shift isn’t so bad… I just can’t get myself to leave my warm and strip away the blanket that’s keeping me from shivering each morning. I like the days too… the busy-ness of it makes time flies… and I think I have been able to manage my time well… I think! Although I don’t like how my preceptor does her schedule (two days on, one day off, one day on, two days off, two days on, one day one two days on…). I don’t know if I do my own scheduling would be better… even then, I still can’t imagine how I was able to survive coming in to work five days a week with alternating weekend off. I admit, I really didn’t have a life then… I would be too tired to do anything when I get home and wouldn’t have enough time to do all the things I want to get done before I went to work. Now, as I am doing days, I could find myself cooking something when I get home (as long as I am off the following day) or actually be able to do some chores and be able to enjoy the day that I’m off – since I could be off from work two or three consecutive days (I even had four days off at one point!).

Then you have the PCAs. I just can’t help but wonder sometimes how we really managed without them. I was talking to a friend who I used to work with. I told him that our patient ratio is 6 patients is to one nurse. He told me that they get the same load… then I reminded him that we get PCAs and they don’t. My point, exactly. It’s just funny how sometimes I would find myself making a bed or preparing a commode for a patient and think of how we used to do at LEAST 4 beds a night before our shift was over; the only time that we actually spend more than two minutes with a patient. How we used to run and put the patient on a commode and running to the next room to empty their foley, only to go back to the patient and clean after them.

I guess what I’m trying to say is… maybe the grass isn’t greener on the other side of the fence. There are also patches of brown and maybe some with bugs… but I think no matter how greener it is on the other side (or the lack of it), the most important thing is that we grow from what we are doing. We learn, and appreciate the things that we have experienced in the previous fence…

I’m still glad that I was able to experience what I have experienced. It may have made some of my skills dull, but it surely sharpened a different part of it. I’m just glad, now I think I am in the right place for growth.

i am officially 26!

2008-10-20T11:01:00.005-04:00

this year's birthday wasn't a week long celebration (don't ask me how it became a week long celeb!), since i had to work on the day of, it was celebrated the day before and the day after.

the day before, horacio took the more relax route this year. we had dinner at astoria called Grand Cafe. the place and food was great. we had dipping platter to start and a bottle of white wine. for our entree i had the chicken kebob with mixed veggies and sweet potato fries (yum!). Horacio had their burger with fries. it was a nice dinner, talked about how my life has changed and my walk with the Lord. for dessert we had this really yummy greek dessert.. it was phyllo with some kind of custard in it... don't ask me what it was called it was a mouthful! the dessert was really good! it was light and not too sweet. although it was a nice evening, we couldn't walk around since i had to be home and get my night's sleep for the next day.

(from horacio)

the day of, went to work which was okay, for some part. it was a fairly quiet day, until it was time for us to give report... a patient coded. wasn't able to leave work unit almost 8! got tons of phone calls (which i missed all of it hence the voicemail!), text messages and e-greetings! (thanks to everyone who greeted and remembered!) as i got home, i was surprised with a nice arrangement of fruits from edible arrangements - from the estrellas! changed into my pjs and watched tv. it was a nice 'quiet' moment for me. was able to speak to my sister, dad, auntie fe and jacqueline for a good amount of time...

(from nancy, the estrellas and ahiya)

next morning, woke up rushing to get to sunday school and service. then waited for mom and the rest of the family for like 3 hours for us to celebrate my birthday over lunch. we had korean food at flushing. then horacio, wench and i headed out to madison square garden for the greg laurie harvest 08. met up with friends then had a late dinner at chipotle!

although, my birthday this year was very low key, it was great. i just feel blessed with my life right now and just happy that i was able to share it with those who matter most - my family.

A Tribute to Pablo.

2008-10-15T20:14:00.003-04:00

I was able to finish work (really) early today. As I was walking out of the unit, I opened a message from horacio "I have bad news for you". I called him, and he broke the news to me. A patient that has been at Elmhurst for almost a year passed away. He came in, he was Eric's admission, very confused and in a bad state. He was on close observation (meaning, someone had to sit with him to make sure he is safe), for he was a really difficult patient. He was confused and spoke only Spanish, which made things a bit more difficult for us. I remember he would refuse all medications and blood sugar tests from everyone. But we found a way to give the antibiotics to him anyway. Soon, he would ask for that 'special' sandwich that the Chinita would give him. Once he gets it and eats it, I would ask him how the sandwich was and he would always say it's bitter yet would finish it in seconds! As days passed by, he got better... he wasn't being watched anymore, he was slowly walking on his own. His diagnosis resolved and would be seen walking around the unit all the time. He would eat so much! We would get two trays just for him, and he would even take the snacks for the other diabetic patients! He would be seen sitting down with another patient's family, chatting with them and when you pass by he'd tell you that that person is his friend.

Even with the language barrier, he would joke around with the nurses. He was actually a very naughty one… he would start saying things that you wouldn’t believe he was capable of saying, and we’d all just have a good laugh with him.

The last time I had him, he had a fever. We wouldn’t see him out of his room or even hear him beg for some galletas with jelly (he doesn’t like peanut butter!). We were all hoping and praying for him to get better. One night, since it was quiet, we were able to put him on a chair and gave him a good shower. The following day, his fever got better few days after that he was walking around again and hanging out at the patient’s lounge with his cap on tilted slightly to the right.

I don’t know if he fully knows me or remember me each day I say hi to him, or give him his meds. Since I have left the hospital, I would ask about him whenever I speak to someone from the unit. I would even ask Horacio how he was doing whenever Horacio tells me that he passed by the floor. When I came to visit, I made sure I passed by his room just to say hi and ask him how he was doing.

Last time I saw him was Saturday. They teased me about taking him home with me since (I think) they are having a hard time finding placement for him. They had told me that he wasn’t doing well again. Though most thought he would bounced back like he always did in the past.

Today, I was told that he was transferred to a different unit. He had coded there yesterday and was transferred once more in a more critical care unit, where he passed away.

I have had patients who had touched my heart, whom I had cared for dearly and passed away. With this one, I never thought I could get affected this way. I may not personally know him, his past life, who he really was. I guess, the things that I have known about him, his antics, him teasing the kids or other nurses about his eye, calling a nurse his friend and describing her as the one with the coca-cola bottle body, the one who changed his last name just because he thought the real one was too long and complicated. That was all that I needed to know, to treat him almost like family.

I know that whoever he was, he had a family, had loved someone, is now being missed by someone; he is in God’s grace now. Resting.

me likey...

2008-10-13T12:17:00.002-04:00

these bootsies!!! :)

help!

2008-10-10T17:00:00.006-04:00

i have been looking for a perfect pair of boots and pumps...

i want/need boots that i could wear during the winter season that would look nice with a dress (or skirt)! i need it to be really comfortable to walk around with and really nice looking. i want it with at least an inch or two heels. i am not a big fan of the stitches in front of it.. just a simple, sleek boots. black boots.

next is a pair (or three!) of nice pumps... something that i could wear with dresses and skirts (during the spring, summer and fall months) or with pants. again, something that is really comfortable that i could walk around with! i need it in black, beige and white.

if anyone has any idea where i could get these please let me know. i have been searching and each time i see one it just don't feel right. please direct me to the right store.

thanks! :)

GASP

2008-10-10T16:28:00.003-04:00

eight days to go and i'm turning 27!! err... 26... whatever!

i think this is the first time that i didn't do my countdown. i used to start counting down at least a month ahead! no, i don't think it's the age thing... i just got so cought up with my new job and trying to adjust to the groove of the unit. although, i think i'm adjusting well andgetting along well with the staff (really well that i think they are plotting to fail my orientation just so i stay on days!).

another reason is that i'm working on the day off. though i'm off the day before and after, guess that made it even worst! horacio had planned something for me on the 17th (though we'd be meeting up with the wedding planner earlier that day)... sorry mom, don't think we could go away... my preceptor's schedule is really messed up. and i couldn't change it... the 19th, we'd be going to a Harvest concert at madison square - which we bought the tickets months ago!

though i want to do something... been thinking about it but i don't know what day to do it on... i'm afraid that it's gonna be on a weekday though.. we'll see..

I Bid Adieu

2008-09-06T13:45:00.002-04:00

After (exactly) eighteen months, i took my last report, did may last discharge and admission, reported to my supervisor, cleaned my patient, and handed over to the night shift.

September 5, 2008 marked the last day of my job with Elmhurst Hospital. I admit, it was rather bittersweet. I wanted leave rather quietly, told only a handful of people that I had rendered in my resignation and told them to please not tell everyone. Until, our unit supervisor decided to write on the final scheule, next my name (instead of leaving it blank), RESIGNED. Inquiries started, I tried to dodge questions until the week of.

Wednesday, the 3rd, the evening staff threw a "surprise" farewell party for me. (unfortunately, i have no pictures to show!!). I don't know how, but I guess it's only my sister who could pull a real surprise for me. I knew, I suspected, that there are things going on. I didn't want to go, but Horacio had made me. It was nice, I felt special....

Thursday came, farewell and well wishes poured in... it was nice.

Friday came, as a final gesture, I made cupcakes for the supervisors who had been there for me through all the stressful times in the unit, and for the staff. The unit supervisor and head nurse got me a cake and wished me well few hours into the shift. I had to discharge five patients, so I didn't have the time to let it all sink in, I still have work to do. The day went by quietly, thank God. For a Friday, the floor was quiet. Not much admission, by ten o'clock, my partner and I were done for the day. Patient's were cleaned and resting comfortably in bed. Most nurses where in the station chatting... and more well wishes were said. (It would have been a great time to take pictures with them... but I totally forgot!!)

11 pm crept in... the night nurses (slowly) started to trinkle in. I got a call from my mommy-poo and had told me not to leave before seeing her. As she came in the unit, she had brought me a plant. I gave my final report and said my good-byes.

I left the unit feeling sad yet a whole lighter.

Leaving felt kind of weird in a way, but fulfilling in another. Supervisors had nothing but nice words to say to me, the feedback that I have gotten from my peers had boost my ego. I really didn't know how I was doing as a nurse and co-worker until day I left. Somehow, I felt bad having to leave my patients. As I said good night to them, I prayed that someone would be able to give them the smile and care for them as much as I have.

Now, I could say that I have left a footprint in my unit and have made a difference. I pray, as I go on my path, with His bleassings, that I continue making a difference in people's lives

Care Package

2008-09-02T20:45:00.006-04:00

Few days ago, my cousin and her kids arrived from their month long trip to manila. My sister had been insisting me to go to their place and pick up the care package that she has sent for us. Knowing how tiring a 20-something hour flight could be, I decided to wait another day to let them settle in. then I was told that they went to poconos for the long weekend, so I had to wait a couple more days.

Anyhow, since I have been out the whole day, and horacio and I were passing by their place returning home. We decided to drop by their place and pick up the things. As soon as we got their, we were surprised on how much my sister had sent for us. we stayed for a while, chatted and rested our tired feet, then decided to haul the things back home.

As soon as we got home, I immediately tried to open the blue bag that my sister had insisted that I would enjoy so much. I tried to rip the packaging tape that she ever-so-tightly wrapped around it. I conquered and claimed my two sandals from the bazaar, and horacio claimed the flip-flops!!

Then I went and pried open the white box that has my name on it. The sarong and blue shirt that I have left behind welcomed my site and threw them aside. Then I found a poster of the teleserye that I have been drawn to since my last visit. I thought it was funny (nice) touch, since she told me that the dvds (that I have been begging for) won’t be available until September – too late for my cousin to bring. As I took things out I discovered not one, not two but FIVE DVDs of LOBO!! I shrieked! I danced! I was exhilarated!! She is such a surprise-puller (is there such word?)!! I took everything out (which included a dress, Spanish fans, wedding magazine, starserve buttons and shirts), laid them all out, took a picture, placed them all in the box. Took them to my room.

Now, if you text or call me, and I seem to not answer. I am watching lobo.

THANKS SO MUCH SIS!! I REALLY LOVE EVERYTHING!!!

Ps: the dress is perfect for my upcoming trip to cancun! ;)

on the job market

2008-08-07T16:23:00.002-04:00

no, i am (still) employed. just trying to spread my wings and see what's out there. i sometimes feel like i'm wasting away at my current job. i need a new environment. i need 12-hour shift!!! having to work 5-days a week and every other weekend, could really put a strain on you. at first, the schedule seemed ideal. but with the stress and a day-off after working four days straight and back on for another four days, really not ideal! i mean, i love what i do. i love being with the elderly... but it really is taking a toll. i haven't had a decent summer since last i started. the only time i was able to enjoy it was when i was away (florida and manila). yes, i went back to manila twice this year, but i paid it back. i was working all weekend of july!!!

so today, i went for a job interview.. it was stressful!! it's a great hospital to work at and the unit where i am being interviewed for is so nice (i felt like i was in a hotel!!) and the patient ratio!! but it's just so far away... i've taken into consideration that i would only be traveling three times a week... but on those days, i would be leaving home at 5:30 and get home by 9. and if i drive? talk about gas prices and parking fees!! and if it was a really bad day? i'm just afraid that traveling would take a toll on me.

next week is another job opportunity... this one is closer... same unit as i am now... we just have to wait and see, i guess.

... am just glad they didn't ask me to tell them about myself!! why must they ask that? i mean, it should be a simple question... but i just tend to draw blank. but i think today's interview went well.. no complaints about it. i think i did ok, considering i was ready to lay on one of the empty rooms!!

just blabbing (as usual)...

updates.. updates.. updates...

2008-07-13T14:43:00.003-04:00

i see i haven't updated for quite a while now... so, here i am!

i can't believe it's been almost three weeks since we came back from our trip to philippines! i'm still trying to get over the time difference, my body seems to find it hard because of my work schedule. but, today am better.

last sunday, i wasn't able to attend the service (finish the service). after sunday school, we went straight to worship. few minutes into it, i just felt this overwhelming weakness all over my body. i sat down, hoping it would go away. it felt like how my body responds in a car running 60mph and suddenly coming to a halt each block. so horacio decided to take me home, since he said i didn't look good. went home and slept. thank God a co-worker of mine had to switch days with me... so, i was able to rest. the rest did me good.

nausea and fatigue didn't stop there... it lingered for couple more days, leading to me calling in sick on wednesday. wherein i stayed put and did some tasks that didn't require me to get up from my desk or leave my room. horacio checked my bp, it was good... so i'm guessing it's my sugar.... since, i don't have glucometer, i'm leaving it up to that.

work has been quite stressful. my first week back more than the others. the first day i came back, i had a patient who had a stroke and seized... we had to transfer him to a critical care unit... i was running around, doing blood draw (which, thanks to adrenaline, i got the first time! he had no veins!!). giving meds to doctors to push.. making sure he gets a bed and survives the night. the following day, patient's bp was so low that we had to give him bolus and monitor him very closely. as what anne told me, i brought back jinx! it was crazy!

just this thursday, after i came back to work (called in the previous day), i was welcomed with a patient who was having tachycardia no matter how much metoprolol push was given... as soon as i came in, i couldn't do anything but be with the patient until he was trannsfered to cardiac icu.

somehow i felt like i was being punished by my floor for going away for two weeks!! we've also been short staffed lately, since two of our staff had to leave to another unit and shift. to top it all, i would be working for the next three weekends - to pay back for the weekend that i was gone! man, i really need a different hospital!! i am so desperate for a twelve-hour shift!!! summer is about to end... if i haven't left for manila, this summer would have the same fate as the last. it just ended before i knew it.

on the brighter note of things... wedding planning seems to be going on smoothly. was so happy to be able to pick my sister's brain!! we have a theme!! everything will be divulge in due time. i'm so excited!! we've booked a reception place, which is also a possible place for the ceremony. i've sent out the contract for my photographer. contacted the make-up artist. now, i just have to meet up with the wedding planner (that is inclusive of my reception package) to fix some other details.

other non-wedding stuff.. i have a female crush! hehehe well.. i just find her pretty and all... but the two weeks in manila made me realize how cute and adorable angel locsin is! hehehe the manila trip did so much to me... i never thought i would watch a tele-novela... but here i am, holding on to 5 volumes of Lobo!! am on volume three, and my sister owes me the final dvd of the novela!! but it's not only i who got hooked to lobo.. my mom and bro too!! (my brother is so gonna kill me!)

also, i have been cooking again!! yup, i am back in the kitchen and enjoying it!! the other day i made stir fry chicken with vegetables.. then i made red beans with rice and chicken! i love to cook and i really missed it! also made a fridge cake, which horacio devoured! what can i say, i make a mean fridge cake!

.....

today is such a nice day outside. am not working... went to sunday school and finished the service! came home and the house was so stuffy! so i decided to open the windows, since it's so breezy outside. today is such a good day for just lazing around. no ac for me today! just me and the breez of cool air.

anyways, that's it for today.. am gonna go through my clothes.. it's time to sort what to keep and what to give. ta-ta for now! :)

another sleepless night...

2008-03-11T02:13:00.002-04:00

been in bed for like more than an hour... my sleeping habits had been awful that i waste all my time during the day trying to catch up before going to work. i guess jackie was right, my time is just as if i am still in manila.

yes, i spoke to jackie. called her up the other day for her birthday. i missed that little brat! she was really talking to me.. she wasn't her usual whining self, i guess she was in a great mood since it was her birthday and all.

ok.. back to the reason why i couldn't sleep tonight... wedding. i know, horacio and i made a deal about not planning it until after marleni's wedding. but i couldn't help it. i wasn't even trying to think about it, and was even trying to push it out of my head. but the idea for the escort cards kept popping up and it just seems so cute and i get all excited again! maybe it's because of saturday....

saturday was marleni's bowling thingy for all the bridesmaids and groomsmen (plus horacio). she just appears so relaxed about the whole thing. i dunno... i also felt so envious of her, having her sister by her side and all. getting these evites from her sister, plans for a bridal shower, dress fitting and another night out with the bridal party. i think things would have been different if achi was here. i think i wouldn't be as stressed as i have/had been if my sister was actually here, planning and helping my finally make up my mind and make some decisions. it's hard... horacio kept trying to make feel better by saying that our friends are around and willing to help me plan, but it's just not the same. it's really not the same. no offense to my friends, they are great and all and i know and am thankful for them, but... i guess there really is no comparison when it comes to family. no matter how they could drive you crazy... i guess this is where my stress stems from... feeling that there's no other way to plan this but with my sister. it just feels weird having a friend plan your bridal shower and shop for wedding dress when you have a sister. not to mention, someone who plans these type of events for other people. i just feel like my wedding won't be complete without her by my side and without my dad to give me away as well. i've always wanted a father-daughter dance, eventhough i know my dad isn't the type to dance in public (nor in private). i've always dreamed "butterfly kisses" would be the song for my father-daughter dance. i remember playing that song to horacio before coz i wanted him to hear it, i cried and just thought of my dad. i know.. i'm very emotional and sentimental... i'm gonna be needing a waterproof make-up on my wedding day!

i just hope there would be some sort of miracle that would make all my prayers come true.

On Being Engaged

2008-02-22T01:18:00.002-05:00

so, yes, it has finally sunk in. though i still stare at my ring bewildered by it. hehehe... and i still get depressed whenever knowing my sister (and dad) may not be here on my special day.. and the fact that things would have been easier (and happier) if only my sister was here. but, i have started to look at places for the reception, though the date we really haven't set it in stone. we are still nonchalant about it.. but there is a date hovering above us. i think i know which photographer i want, since i have my eye on them eversince... the dresses and tux could wait, but i've set on the color scheme that i want, thanks to my sister. i plan on not telling anyone about my color scheme unless you're part of the entourage. the flowers, well, that's the other thing that i have set my heart into... the church, well, i have this church that i really want, but they had just turned us down, since they only offer the church for this type of ceremonies to "members of the church" only due to some "legal" thingies in the past. so now, i have to look for another church.. i just want it to be small and have that cozy feeling. as for the reception.. well, the ultimate dream wedding is to have the reception at the brooklyn botanical garden, and since i (and horacio) think that spending $50k on the reception alone is not really practical... it's hard to find a place that is really pretty at the same time within our budget... i knew planning a wedding is hard, i just did think it would be this stressful!! if only achi was here... then there's the flowers and the car service and the dj (yes, we're thinking of hiring a dj) to worry about...

just a couple of days ago, we went into this bridal shop at steinway. i thought they only "sell" bridal gowns.. so we went in, hoping to get a catalog so that i could get more ideas on how i would my gown to look like and the color scheme. when a guy started to talk to us (i think he was the owner) and started to ask me questions.. i was like.. uh... i was so dumbfounded!! i didn't know that there was so much things!! and he started to tell me that they have been doing weddings for over ten years and that they could offer to take care from the dresses to the flowers to the car services. i think the selling point for me was that they don't advertise, they just rely on word of mouth. when we stepped out of that store, i just told horacio that i just felt like hiring them right then and there! i mean, i just felt like he took the weight off my shoulders!! i'm not sure how much a good idea that is though...

so for now.. if anyone out there have any suggestions for a church or reception place or florist or whatever.. please, please, please... don't hesistate!! hehehe

On The Day of Hearts

2008-02-14T22:25:00.009-05:00

This day has been filled with so much emotions.... let me digress..

before we left for manila, horacio suggested that we return to work after valentine's day, so that we would be able to spend valentine's day together with no hassle. so, we scheduled it and got approved...

while in manila, horacio has been insisting to by dress pants and dress shirts... for no apparent reason. i remember telling my sister that i feel like he has something planned out for valentine's day, and all my sister told me was that if he is, don't do anything and spoil the surprise. so, i tried to behave myself.. no questions, no prying.

when we got back to new york, horacio had asked me to just take it easy and get enough rest (since i wasn't feeling my best) and that he wants me to be well for the 14th. the 13th came, and he told me that we had to leave the house at 10 in the morning dress casual and warm, but at night, we had to dress nicely (formal). i was curious... i tried to ask questions, but he wasn't letting in, not even the destination.

the 14th came, woke up at 9 am and got ready. dressed warm enough. we left at 10:10 and took the train, the only hint i got... we're taking the 2 train to bronx. on the way to the bronx, i tried to kept guessing.. but still nothing from him. when we reached 174th street station, he told me that we'd be getting off the next stop.. i wondered what's in the next stop... as soon as we got out of the station, i saw a sign "Bronx Zoo". then i almost shrieked, we're going to the bronx zoo!! i thought to myself, well, he's been wanting to go there but i kept cancelling on him since it was cold and all... i guess this was his way of getting me to go there with him without giving him any type of excuse why we shouldn't go.

we got to bronx zoo, paid entrance, then i mentioned to him how this was the place where our first date was.. and he smiled and said yeah.. then i told him.. although, it was warmer and a lot more people.. he then replied, well, it was in april!

then we walked... went to look for the giraffes, tried to coax them into coming out from their hinding.. and coaxed other animals too. we were like young kids having fun. then we went to the place he loves the most.. the gorillas! we saw the baby gorillas running around in circles, and there was a group of kids (on a field trip, i guess) that joined us, that was our cue to move along...

when we got out of the conga place, on the right side, i saw this nice pond. i asked him if we could pass by there since the view was so nice and i wanted to take pictures. the pond was frozen, it was tranquil, it was nice. we were taking pictures.. when all of a sudden, he became serious. he started to talk about how the zoo has a meaning to us, since that was the place where it all started (our first date). by now, i wasn't really paying attention to what he was saying.. i was just looking at his hands wondering, is he trying to propose to me? he is not reaching for his pockets... he's not trying to propose, is he? he knows not to propose on "special occassion" day... he's not proposing, is he?? then i hear him say that he had a little friend help him out in asking me a question.. i look around and try to search for any human body, ,wondering who's there? marleni? nancy? when he reached for his bag and took out this small little stuffed toy -- MIMOSA! (the first stuff toy he's given me, from the zoo!). around mimosa was a ribbon, with a ring on it!! i was so out of words.. i felt like i was gonna cry at the same time i was telling myself not to cry... then he asked me the ultimate question - will you marry me? of course... i started to kiss him and said.. Yes.***

we started to call family and friends who has been a part (and behind) all the planning... then went home. we called more people... most people were happy, some were, let's say not expecting this thing to happen so soon.

then, he told me that we had to leave by 4:30.. so by 4, i started to get ready to leave... again, he wouldn't let in on where we were going. my only clue was, we were going to the meat packing district.

when we got there.. the restaurant's name sounded familiar.. Morimoto. he looked at me and asked me if the name sounded familiar. my head was just blank.. then he said.. iron chef? i was like... iron chef morimoto!!! i was... how are you able to pull this things for me?? i was astounded. the dinner was yummy (as usual!) we saw the chef, but was too shy to have our pictures taken. he looked friendly though, but he just kept a low profile. i was full by the time they served the kobe beef (yes, i finally have tried kobe beef.. and it was... no words to describe it!). we talked about how our family reacted.. we also decided to let the whole thing sink in first before we really start planning...

so yeah... i got engaged on a valentine's day. cliche, i know.. but it just gave the number 14 a whole new meaning for me. :) i think i am the happiest girl alive today. and i have horacio to thank for, for he is the cause of my happiness. :)

*** upon proposing, he took out his ipod and started to play our song... he had a playlist ready just for the occassion!! hehehe... i used to tease him before (even before we started going out) that he always have a background music in everythin he does, for he always have earphones on him!

back from the warmth...

2008-02-12T23:55:00.004-05:00

it's almost midnight... end of the first day back here in cold, snowing new york. tried to blog each day while in manila, but time did not allow me to, aside from the fact that there was a lack of internet access.

anyways, here i am, going to do some justice in writing my account on my trip to philippines... (warning: this could be a lenghty one!)

2008.01.24 - Flight to Manila.

I have been looking forward to this day, it has been a mixed of different emotions. I was excited and nervous on how jackie would welcome back horacio. knowing that spoiled little one, she could be quite difficult.

2008.01.25 - Arrival in Manila.

Dad, Achi, Jackie, Auntie Fe, Ahiya Pat and Achi Pearlie picked us up from the airport. As soon as we got settled at my sister's apartment, we realized that there was luggage that did not belong to neither one of us. we checked the name and lo and behold - it belonged to someone else. we had to call our cousin, who lived closer to us, to drive us back to the airport. Although the luggage that we left behind looked so much different than the one we picked up, good thing it was still there! After all that luggage incident was settled, the three of us stayed up talking in my sister's bedroom.

2008.01.26 - First Day in Manila.

First breakfast in manila consisted of tocino, sunnyside eggs, rice and coffee -- all courtesy of my then yaya (nanny) manang belen. then we went to pepsi herrera for my (first!) gown fitting. i was scared that it may be to tight on me, since i got fitted in september of 2007. i loved the dress, and yes it did needed to be altered - it was big around my waist! the dress was really nice. it was kinda like a halter but not really. it's hard to describe it. after the fitting, we all had our nails done (manicure and footspa!). i felt bad for horacio though, for each time we are at tips 'n toes, he usually gets pampered by getting a massage at a nearby spa. unfortunately, that day, all three nearby spa wasn't available... so he ended up having a massage in a chair with the rest of us. after the massage, he and my brother went to get their haircut, while me and my sister bought stuff for our cousin's bridal shower. for dinner, we all met up with dad, jackie and auntie fe at italliani's. dad was his humorous self, which was caught in video!! afterwards, me, achi and horacio went to the fort and bought ourselves 2 dozens of krispy kreme and went home to do some final preparations for the bridal shower.

2008.01.27 - Achi Pearlie's Bridal Shower.

The bridal shower was held at Sonya's in Tagaytay. It was a nice day, with episodes of light rain. people were staring at our table, since we did some (clean) games and achi pearlie was weraing a bride-to-be tiara and sash. it was nice... yet tiring day!! afterwards, we all headed back to magallanes and had dinner there (prawns, crabs... yum!) with the rest of the family.

2008.01.28 - Bohol Day One.

Woke up early in the morning for our flight to Bohol. There was eight of us who went... me, my bro, my sis, horacio, marianne, and our cousins antoinette, jennifer and lester. it was a nice day in bohol, although i couldn't really enjoy the sun since the color of the dress that i would be wearing for the wedding wouldn't look nice if i was "dark". so, i tried to enjoy the water as much as possible and of course, i had a massage by the beach!! we spent the rest of the day by the shade, reading books, ordering mango shakes... for dinner, we had freshly caught seafood - squid, tanigue and the likes. fresh seafood never tasted so good and so cheap!! we also had some barbecue, sinigang and grilled eggplant. :)

2008.01.29 - Bohol Day Two.

Another early day for us... we had breakfast of friend(!) eggs. then we went for some touristy things... we went for bohol's seven stops. (1) the blood compact shrine, (2) tarsiers in captive, (3) the chocolate hills, (4) hanging bridge, (5) lunch on loboc river, (6) largest python in captive (prony), (7) baclayon church - first church in bohol. although, we couldn't really enjoy the sun that day, since it was raining, we still had a good time. en route, we also saw how bolos(machetes) are made.

2008.01.30 - Bohol Day Three.

Had to be ready by 6:30 in the morning for some dolphin watching! waking up that early was so worth it!! inspite of the strong waves, we saw a lot of dolphins - in the wild!! they were so cute! i wanted to jump into the ocean and ride them! after the dolphins have left us, we all headed to an island and had our breakfast. then headed back to the resort and rested.

2008.01.31 - Final Day in Bohol and Achi Pearlie's Despedida de Soltera.

After catching our flight back to manila, we headed straight to my dad's place for some lunch. on the way, we called dad and teased him if we could have jackie skip chinese class.. to our surprise, dad agreed and we called auntie fe so that she could ask permission from jackie's teachers. after lunch, we all hang out, and i tried on jackie's dress for the wedding. it fit me right (though it also needed some alterations!). the dress and her shoes fits me!! after that we went back to my sister's place to get some clothes and freshen up before going to magallanes and head to mall of asia's china place for achi pearlie's despedida de soltera. this is also the day where all the relatives are in. we had to reserve a room for 37 people (all immediate relatives) not including the nannies for the little ones!! having the room all to ourself and realizing that it's just family is crazy! i couldn't believe how much the family has grown. greeting each other alone takes us at least 30 minutes! Afterwards, my sister and i stayed behind magallanes and finished putting ribbons and tags on my cousin's wedding souvenirs. we finished at around 4 in the morning!!

2008.02.01 - Jollibee!!

After a long night.. we woke up late and decided to have brunch delivered. so, we had Jollibee!!! needless to say, i ordered more than i could handle... but it was great! i love jollibee.... i mean, who doesn't? after getting ready, we picked dup my dress.. which was lovely and fit me just right. we did some errands and went to magallanes once more for dinner.

2008.02.02 - Eve of the Wedding.

We all checked-in at the Hyatt Hotel, did some last minute shopping for the wedding. took all the space at tips 'n toes and had our nails done (it was a nails day with the ong family!). even jackie had her nails done!! afterwards, we had dinner with the family and helped out achi pearlie in stuffing in envelopes that would be given the following day.

2008.02.03 - Tan-Maceda Nuptial.

The most awaited day came. The wedding was held at San Miguel Church (inside Malacañang). It was a lovely day and we were blessed with some rain. The ceremony was nice. The reception was fun. there were some nervous parents, afraid that their little ones won't walk the aisle. tears were shed during the reception. philippe and pao-pao serenaded the couple with a chinese song.

2008.02.04 - Flight to Iloilo.

After Auntie Fe picked-up Horacio and to took him to their place so that he could watch the Superbowl at 8 in the morning. We all got ready and had breakfast at the hotel. After which, we packed all our things and went to pick up horacio and headed to catch our 3pm flight to iloilo. when we arrived at iloilo, we were surprised how the airport has changed. it was much nicer than the old one, although it was so far from the city. after checking in at iloilo business hotel, we headed out get food for dinner to bring to my grandma's place. they weren't expecting for us to come, as soon as we got to my grandma's new place, she just had dinner. she was rather in a good mood. was chatty and kept calling me to sit next to her. as we bid farewell, and told her that we'd come back the next day to have lunch with her, i couldn't stop myself for feeling bad. my sister told me that she is in much better place now compared to her previous situation. in truth, my grandma did look better.

2008.02.05 - Iloilo Day Two and Flight Back to Manila.

After getting grocery for my grandma and her sister's family, we picked up my grandma and took her to Breakthrough. once again, fresh seafood, green mangoes with shrimp paste, raw oysters! After lunch we dropped my grandma off and headed straight to the airport. After dropping of four things at my sister's apartment, we all headed out once again to meet up with her friends for dinner at Cena and picked up jackie on our way back home.

2008.02.06 - Chinese New Year's Eve.

Went to Divisoria with Auntie Fe and achi in the morning. my sister did all the haggling for me! bought tons of scrubs... man, i bought worth $100 of scrubs (16 scrubs in total... which would cost triple the price if bought from here!). Then we received a call from dad saying that we should go to malate and for the offer for ammah. after we were done haggling, we went straight, as per dad's order, to malate and paid our respects and had lunch. then we went back to my sister's apartment annd got ready for donner at magallanes in celebration of chinese new year. after dinner, some of us went back home, and some went to malate to witness the dragon dance and fireworks display.

2008.02.07 - Lito Sy Pictorial.

This pictorial was actually my idea... it's been a while since we had a decent photo. since my sister suggested that we try a different photographer, and after seeing his works, we went for lito sy. although, it was not really him who took the pictures... it was fun. the pictures came out great. after the pictorial, we all headed to my dad's place for dinner and went back home to rest and pack our things for an overnight stay at batangas.

2008.02.08 - Anilao Day One.

After a long ride, we finally got to eagle's point resort. we got in just in time for lunch, so after we were all settled in our cottages, we all headed out to sepok island to have our lunch there. i took advantage of the sun, read a little and joined in the water with horacio and jackie. then, we headed back to the main resort and got ourselves ready for some scuba diving. horacio, marianne and i had a crash course of intro to diving. although horacio wasn't able to join us into the deep, since he was not comfortable breathing and all... it was still enjoyable. we saw all these colorful fishes, bright coral and gigantic clams!! an hour later, we went back on shore and the dive instructor took horacio for a short trip down under. which was nice of him... i think diving is not for me though. i enjoyed the experience, but i think it's not something that i would look forward to doing over and over and over again.

2008.02.09 - Anilao Day Two and Back to Manila.

Woke up really early in the morning, had breakfast with the family and head out for the sun. with only a couple of hours before we left, i tried to take in as much sun as possible. had fun in the pool with jackie and horacio. by 11:30 we all headed back to our cottages and got ready to leave. we had lunch at chowking and stopped by at the factory where my dad works. picked up a pair of slippers. then we met up with my sister at rockwell and had shabu-shabu (hot pot) for dinner. when dinner was done, we decided to head out to a store, as soon as we got there, we saw our aunts and cousins where there as well. then we all headed home and ordered some full body massage.

2008.02.10 - Last Day in Manila.

Last day in manila was spent with some last minute shopping. had lunch at magallanes (achi pearlie's famous carbonara!). did some more errands. had dinner at my dad's place. and passed by achi pearlie's condominium.

2008.02.11 - Flight back to NY.

after tearful goodbyes... i wasn't really prepared to leave yet... i felt like the first time i left manila. i have gone back to manila a couple times before, and i have never felt this sad to leave. upon arriving new york, i could still feel the sadness in me... i don't know why, but i just do. i miss the warmth of the family there... the togetherness of the family. the closeness.

first day was mostly spent in bed and segragating things for people. was suppose to celebrate mom's birthday, but unfortunately she is nowhere to be found... it's back to reality for me, i guess.. back to the cold, cold, new york.

Warmth please.....

2008-01-22T12:11:00.000-05:00

In few days time, Horacio, my bro, Marianne and i would be miles and miles away from the frigid weather of new york. it's been like 9 degrees outside (according to my body). yesterday was a crazy day fro me and horacio. had to cancel lunch on him (again) just so we could finish what we need to accomplish before we get warmth. two more days on the floor and we are out of here... for sure they would torment us before leaving, as always is the case whenever you are looking forward to something, something just happens that would make you really wanna leave for that vacation. right now, i actually am procastinating... being lazy to pack my luggage... have to go to the bank as well too before going to work at 3. actually i have piled up the clothes that i think i would be using... only for horacio to go through it later and talk me some sense and put back the other clothes. i know, i am not new in packing and traveling, but i really tend to over pack for unknown reasons. i remember going to boston overnight, i couldn't even carry my "overnight" bag!!

anyways, i really am looking forward to this trip... my cousin's getting married (and i'm gonna be the only bridesmaid!!), bought some stuff for the bridal shower (kinda helping my sis in planning it)... the bridal shower is gonna be held like the second day that we get in manila... then four warm, relaxing days in bohol... then the wedding itself, then off for a 24-hour trip to iloilo, then off again for an intro to dive in batangas... i know, it's a crazy schedule...

i can't wait to see my little cousins, neice and nephew... i can't wait for jackie's reaction as soon as she sees horacio and marianne... i can't wait for her antics, for her "opinion"... can't wait to hear dad try to communicate with marianne and horacio... can't wait to spend time with family from germany and switzerland, for cousins that i haven't met or seen for the longest time...

i can't wait to have all the yummy food, seafood, fruits... shakes... jollibee.

i can't wait for my toes to keep warm and stop getting the numb feeling i get.

i can't wait.

2008-01-12T14:27:00.001-05:00

What Jennifer Lynn Means

You are fair, honest, and logical. You are a natural leader, and people respect you.
You never give up, and you will succeed... even if it takes you a hundred tries.
You are rational enough to see every part of a problem. You are great at giving other people advice.

You are friendly, charming, and warm. You get along with almost everyone.
You work hard not to rock the boat. Your easy going attitude brings people together.
At times, you can be a little flaky and irresponsible. But for the important things, you pull it together.

You are very intuitive and wise. You understand the world better than most people.
You also have a very active imagination. You often get carried away with your thoughts.
You are prone to a little paranoia and jealousy. You sometimes go overboard in interpreting signals.

You tend to be pretty tightly wound. It's easy to get you excited... which can be a good or bad thing.
You have a lot of enthusiasm, but it fades rather quickly. You don't stick with any one thing for very long.
You have the drive to accomplish a lot in a short amount of time. Your biggest problem is making sure you finish the projects you start.

You are loving, compassionate, and ruled by your feelings.
You are able to be a foundation for other people... but you still know how to have fun.
Sometimes your emotions weigh you down, but you generally feel free from them.

You are wild, crazy, and a huge rebel. You're always up to something.
You have a ton of energy, and most people can't handle you. You're very intense.
You definitely are a handful, and you're likely to get in trouble. But your kind of trouble is a lot of fun.

You are relaxed, chill, and very likely to go with the flow.
You are light hearted and accepting. You don't get worked up easily.
Well adjusted and incredibly happy, many people wonder what your secret to life is.

You are a free spirit, and you resent anyone who tries to fence you in.
You are unpredictable, adventurous, and always a little surprising.
You may miss out by not settling down, but you're too busy having fun to care.

What's Your Name's Hidden Meaning?

Four Things

2008-01-12T14:02:00.000-05:00

Four things about me that you may or may not have known in no particular order.

Four jobs I have had in my life

1. Nurse

2. Secretary

3. File Clerk

4. Legal Assistant

Four movies I would watch over and over:

1. P.S. I Love You

2. 50 First Date

3. Happy Feet

4. Incredibles

Four Places I have Lived:

1. Queens, NY

2. Brooklyn, NY

3. Manila, Philippines

4. Iloilo, Philippines

TV Shows that I watch:

1. Journeyman

2. Lost

3. How I Met Your Mother

4. October Road

Four places I have been:

1. Florida

2. Virginia

3. Las Vegas

4. Kentucky

People who e-mail me (regularly): No particular order

1. tita carmen

2. mom

3. manang bing

4. spam included?

Four of my favorite foods:

1. Cutlets (South Indian Style)

2. Sinigang

3. Spaghetti with Meatballs

4. Isaw!!!

Four places I would rather be right now:

1. Beach

2. Beach

3. Beach

4. Beach

Four Friends I think will respond:

1. Mommy Chi

2. Cary

3. Marichu

4. who ever is bored enough.. hehe

I am looking forward to 2008:

1. Almost three weeks off work -- Philippines vacation!

2. Achi Pe-Ann's Wedding

3. Marleni's Wedding

4. More vacation trips

2008-01-04T13:55:00.000-05:00

So Cute!!!

2007-11-17T13:55:00.001-05:00

A Christian-filled Saturday

2007-11-11T15:23:00.000-05:00

"Submitting to one another in the fear of God. Wives, submit to you own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the saviour of the body. Therefore, just as the church is the subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her. That He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word. That He might present her to Himslef a glorious wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." (Ephisians 5:21-31)

No, I am not engaged, yet... :)

Horacio signed us up with Redeemer Presbyterian Church for a seminar "Prepering for Marriage". The first time that he mentioned this to me, I felt unease with the idea. I asked him why he wants us to attend that seminar, we aren't even engaged yet. He told me that the seminar isn't just for couples who are engaged, but also for those planning. Basically, it was open for all couples.

So, Saturday, we both woke up early to attend to this seminar around 36th Street and Broadway. The Pastor opened with the verse above, Horacio and I looked at each other when the Pastor started to read the verse. Horacio and I have discussed this versed before... After the Pastor read the verse and prayed over... he stated the purpose of the seminar -- to break up couples. Weird, right? He went on to explain that the seminar was meant as to let the couple see where they are at the moment and to test them.

People get married for a reaason, most of their reasons are because of love. Which is in part right, but mostly wrong. We don't have to get married just because we love each other. Love fades with time. Marriage is something that we promise to each other that we would be there for that person not today but in the coming days. It is not a promise for the present time.

For most part of the seminar, the Pastor discussed the purpose of marriage, communication, finances... He also had us do some activities..

The first activity was to list ten things about our partner that attracts and leads us to why we want to marry that person. We were to discuss this with each other....

My ten things about Horacio are (in no particular order):

1. He's always there for me.

2. He makes me feel secure.

3. He pushes me to be a better person.

4. He understands me and listens to my thoughts whether it makes sense or not.

5. I feel most comfortable with him.

6. He tells me the truth, whether it will hurt my ego, he doesn't take sides.

7. I could talk to him about anything and not feel like I'm being judged.

8. He makes me feel loved.

9. He appreciates and notices the things that I do for him.

10. He has this great relationship with God, and his love for God just shines through him.

After discussing and telling the ten things... I just broke down to tears... Although, I knew about all the things he wrote on his list... I just got too emotional. We were laughing through it.

When that activity was up, the Pastor mentioned that there was a couple that couldn't come up with ten things, so instead of starting a spat, she just made things up. Horacio and I also noticed that the couple sitting next to him where having a little argument.. the guy got a little defensive. Also, two couples sitting in front of us said that they were having a hard time coming up with ten. These couples are already engaged!!

Anyways, as the day went by, and more activites were done. Horacio and I summed up that we have a great relationship. Although we didn't need the seminar to tell us this, it was a nice thing. We both know that which things we need to work on and which things we need to continue doing.

The seminar, just made me realize how Horacio and I are with each other. We both are not hesistant to give and receive affections. Our relationship may have it's down moments, but we both knew how to work it through.

The Pastor then reinforced to us that pre-marital seminar is good, but the best seminar for couples would be after six months into the marriage... Since that would also be the time where the couple is starting to get to know each other more.

The seminar ended around 3:30.... we decided to just hang around 34th street and wait until 5 pm to go to the David Crowder Band Concert. Horacio loves this band so much, I tried to listen to their music, just to familiarize myself with their songs, I didn't enjoy it as much. But when the concert started... man, that was a great band. They did sound way better live than they do on the cd. We were screaming at the top of our lungs... singing with the band. Since I was wearing heels, we sat at the balcony, you could see the crowd down below jumping and enjoying the band. It was great! I told Horacio that I have decided that our kids would be allowed to watch a concert as early as the age of 10.... as long as it's a Christian band!! I think as a parent, I would be assured that there won't be any drugs or booze on the premise and that there would be a lot of parents in the crowd. I have never felt this great.... it's just a different way of glorifying God. Everyone was singing, you could really feel that He is there... it was weird.. a feeling that I could not express...

When the concert ended, Horacio and I went to Tad's Steakhouse. Talked about how the day went for us... the things that we have learned. We discussed about our faith... where we are right now. It was a great, perfect day, with only one person to thank for....

My Five Days Off Work...

2007-11-11T14:53:00.000-05:00

Let me digress...

After a doctor's visit that transpired on Wednesday, I was told to stay home and not work until Monday. It was totally unexpected from the doctor who preached Horacio about calling in sick from work. I was experiencing back pains that couldn't be relieved by any massage or Tylenol since the previous Friday. Plus, I also was experiencing this pinching pain that radiates from my buttocks down to my thigh. The pinching pains happened a couple months ago but went away as soon as it started. I just ignored it, although I had a feeling that it was a nerve. At first, I really wanted to call in sick Wednesday, to go to a friend's (from work) house and have some good Indian food (cutlets!!). I then decided to just go see the doctor, since the back pains wasn't really helping me with work and it's so annoying for it won't go away with any kind of remedy. He told me that the upper back pain was muscle pain and it was (probably) cause by my spinal column pinching around the L1 and L2 area (lower part of the spine), which also causes the pinching pain that I felt around my butt and leg. Anyways, after giving me a note to take five days off and four different prescriptions for pain, the doctor noticed that Horacio was sneezing non-stop. Horacio was off that day, so he just came with me, and although he was not feeling so great, he didn't intend to be seen by the doctor. Knowing the doctor that we have, he checked Horacio's throat, and auscultated his lungs... and wrote a note to take off work until today and a prescription for antibiotics. It turned out Horacio was having Strept Throat.

After the (weird) visit, we went to have our prescriptions filled and off we went to Kew Gardens to my friend's place. When they picked us up from the train station (thank God I listened to them and took the train instead of a cab!), I told Bency and Ashma of what happened. They both told me to really stay home and rest... since the three of us worked in the same unit, they knew that me coming to work with that prognosis will really just complicate things for me (we work in a geriatric floor -- a lot of total care patients!). So, off we went to Bency's and enjoyed great Indian food.

When we got home Wednesday, I took the pills that the doctor prescribed, and was knocked out (by the muscle relaxant pill). Thursday was spent inside the house the whole day with Horacio waking me up for the next dose. I took three doses of that pill hence, sleeping the whole day. Horacio has been the greatest, most patient of all... he was giving my medications, heating up food for me, making sure I am comfortable... all I did was sleep, take medications, go to bathroom and sleep.

Friday came, I decided to stop taking the muscle relaxant pill and just the pain killer (Naproxene). We did the laundry and I did some ironing. The back pain became more bearable but it was still there...

Saturday came, we had to wake up early morning for a seminar that Horacio signed us up for (more on that later...) which was from 9 o'clock in the morning until 3 in the afternoon. Then we hang around Borders on 34th Street, waiting for time until the David Crowder Band concert (more on that later too...).

So, now, Sunday, Horacio went back to work, and I am still here at home. The back pain is at it's minimum, I still took my pain killer med... I am still debating whether to call back my doctor and report to him how I am feeling or wait until I get back to work and see how it goes. I probably would wait.. since I am off on Wednesday, and will be reporting back to work on tomorrow... so, until then.. :)

The Day I Turned 25

2007-10-19T00:54:00.000-04:00

I love celebrating my birthdays. I get to celebrate it more than 24 hours. With families 12-hour ahead in the Philippines and three-hours behind at west coast, you do the math.

My birthday actually started yesterday evening at Horacio's aunts's place. It wasn't really for my birthday, since we were off and I haven't seen them for the longest time, Horacio and I planned to visit them. Dinner there is always with great food, we had Ratatouille and Chicken Parmesan. Tia Florcy is such a great cook! On the plus side, we had some of her guacamole... she makes the best guacamole (it's where we got our version of guac!). I actually told Horacio not to mention to anyone about my birthday, but I was surprised when Tia Aury and Tia Florcy handed me a gift. It's this nice necklace with a heart inside a circle pendant. After a hearty meal, Horacio and I decided to head home, for we were ready to retire for the night (we had a long night the previous night and went all the way to the Bronx earlier that day to visit Gavin).

Upon reaching home, after doing some candy shopping at Hollywood Video, I got to my room to find me five balloons floating around with a gift card!! My brother thought I had work that day and wasn't really expecting me home early. It was from my brother, Marianne and Cary. I love balloons, and been asking for balloons for this coming Saturday, actually. (hehehe.. It's that 2-year old in me, I guess!). Horacio and I situated ourselves in front of the TV and watched "How I Met Your Mother" with the candies that we hoarded when my phone rang - it was my sister!! My first caller (Philippine time). After few minutes of conversation (since she was waiting for her doctor's appointment), we bid farewell and I continued on with the show.

11:58 pm came... my phone started to ring once more... Tito Vic!! He told me that he was actually trying to wait until the last minute (but you know what happens when you do that?!). Tito Vic never fails. He is always there and always calls you no matter what holiday or event it is. When we finished talking, Horacio started his countdown and serenaded me with a his rendition of Happy Birthday. No tears came out this time... :)

Then it was bedtime... as soon as I hit the bed, I fell asleep only to find myself waking up to the sound of my phone -- Marleni!! Now, I actually was disappointed at her, since she is known to wait exactly 12:01 and you'd hear her singing from the other end of the line. All is forgiven, since she explained that she was at work, and admission came around 12. After her warm wishes, back to sleep I did.

Around 7 in the morning, my brother opens my door and starts to sing(?) happy birthday... which I really appreciated but... I was so sleepy that time! Then 9:30 came only to be waken up by my phone... it was my dad. He actually complained why I was still sleeping and just waking up and that he had been calling me only to get a "recording". After much explanation, he place Jackie on the phone and Jackie in turn placed Auntie Fe on. Then my dad felt bad for me and let me go back to sleep. I tried to listen to my voice messages, retrieving two. One from a co-worker of mine, Ashma and her little girl and another one from my dad. As I went through the call history, it turned out my dad only called once!

I tried to go back to sleep but my phone started to ring once more... my sister. She called me and we did a three-way with mom (since she was also calling). We had our laughs (what do you expect... we had mom on the other line). After a good half an hour, we tried to conference in my brother. Twenty minutes later, we all hang-up. Horacio had me open his gifts for me... I was actually excited what he got for me... since I was really clueless as to what I want for my birthday. As I opened the gift (clue that was given to me: I am the only person who's about to have it.)... i found myself opening a gift to the latest of the iPod family -- iPod Touch!! I was so excited to finally see colors and pictures on my iPod!! Horacio told me that it was just about time to retire my iPod (I think I had the second generation iPod!). Then he insisted that I open his card... only find another gift --- tickets for Avenue Q!! After tinkering my new iPod, Horacio had to leave and I had to start getting ready. I had my nails done... and came back home to paly with my new iPod! After getting couple messages from friendster, facebook and my YM, I got a call from Tita Terry, Wilson and Shushana (they remembered!). Then I really started to get ready to get going.

Up until then, Horacio has not revealed where he was taking me for dinner. I chose not to know as well, since I wouldn't even know and would just kill the surprise. So, we hopped on the train, got off 28th Street, and Horacio led me in The Carlton (by Madison Avenue and 29th Street). Our reservation was not for until 5:30, so as we waited the person in-charge directed the sommelier to our direction and we found ourselves drinking some kind of fruity champagne (the sommelier was French and we had a hard time understanding most of the things he said!). Then the chef sent us these three most delicious hors doeuvers (spelling?). One of them was this tiny, little quail egg that seems like a devilled egg... as soon as it hit our mouth, it was just bursting of flavors!! Then there was this canape which was just equally sumptious and there's this cute little pumpkin pie with marshmallow on the top which was.... surperb!! (It was so good that until now, I am wishing for more!). Then we were led to our table. To sum up our dining experience... Country Restaurant at The Carlton is worth the experience. It was really great.. as I told Horacio, he is gonna have a hard time upping up for my next birthday! Chef Zakarian is really great!!! If only we had enough money.. I would love to have my wedding catered by him....

After a great four-course (with some change) meal, we headed out to west 45th Street to watch Avenue Q. Traffic got to us, and we had to run to the at least a block and a half to the theatre -- I was wearing at least three inches of heels!! It was all worth it though!! :) Avenue Q was so great and funny, although, a bit disturbing (muppets are for kids!!!). It was surely and enjoyable experience (It Sucks To Be ME!!). It's highly recommended that you watch it. You'd be laughing from the beginning until you leave the theatre!

People had been calling me the entire evening. Most of the time, I couldn't pick up th phone... and I apologize if I haven't called you back... I am so thankful for all those who remembered, for the warm wishes and prayers. I feel so blessed. I am just so happy (and tired) right now. This has been the greatest birthday so far!! I can't wait for the hat party this Saturday!! :) I love being 25!!

It's Official!!

2007-10-18T00:16:00.000-04:00

I am now 25!!!

.. give me a couple days and i will tell you i am 26! :)

hmmm...

2007-10-14T12:27:00.001-04:00

with four days to go... i have been feeling quite cranky. i don't know where it's stemming from.... hmm..

---------------------

anyways... four days to go!! i really, really can't wait to see what horacio has in store for me... he's been extra secret-y this time. not even a clue what he got me or where we going. i bet it's gonna be a memorable day (or night?).

also, six days from today is my hat party in celebration for my 25th. although i am not inviting the same whole crowd as i did for my birthday last year (since the place is a lot smaller now). i am hoping for a really good one. i am aiming for not too crazy yet crazy enough for it to be memorable. so, come and don't forget to wear your funkiest hat!

a dilemma...

2007-10-05T12:28:00.000-04:00

what to do? have a party at home or just go to a bar with friends? hmmm...

13 days to go!!! can't wait!!! :) i don't know why i can't wait, but i am surely, uberly excited for THE day to come!!!

can i have a quarter life crisis? just so i could have one.. a reason to do something crazy. hehehe

need to breathe..

2007-09-21T00:54:00.000-04:00

today was something else at work. i mean, yeah, it's always busy and stressful especially on my shift. but today... man, i barely saw my patients!! i never thought nursing would be this stressful so much hard work. i guess that's why there's such a shortage and demand in this field.

i was both in charge of the whole floor and a team leader for the side that i was on. this is typical for our floor now, since our charge nurse quit her job almost a month ago. i had to coordinate staffing and relief for those who are doing a 2:1 (two patients is to one nurse --> usually for patients who requires a really close observation i.e. unpredictable behavior). on top of that i had to make sure that the staff for each side is "equal" hence having other staff grumble and make sure that my own team is ok.

today didn't really start out very well... the morning shift staff left us with a lot of clean ups to do. which is so freakingly annoying since they are well staffed in the morning. i don't care how busy it is, how can a person leave a patient dirty?? i don't like getting report from that nurse, since whenever i ask her something her reply would be "do you think i know?" well, uh, duh!! you are the RN, right? you're the team leader, right?? why don't you know?? it's just argh!!! that has always been the case with her, and it's freaking annoying!!! if i gave that kind of report to the night shift, i would have been written up long ago!! this is all happening only before 3:30 pm, mind you and we start our shift at 3. anyways, by 3:45 i got a report for an admission (direct admission from the clinic) and by 4:10 that patient came up already!! thank God that patient was so nice enough, since the bed wasn't made yet when she came up so she had to wait a couple minutes. by 5:30 i have finished my admission, placed a condom catheter to another patient of mine and discharged the other patient. then the nurse that was working with me gave me the narc key for it was already 6 and it was time for her break so that she could relieve one of the nurse who was doing a 2:1. 6:15, i told another nurse on my team for his break so. by 6:30 his admission came, i had to take the vital signs for that patient and call kitchen so that they could send up a tray for him. in between all these i was running back and forth to another patient's room, for his bed alarm kept going off. he was so confuse that he keeps getting out of bed inspite that fact that he has unsteady gait -- thank God no incident happened!! then i quickly did my charting, by 7:15 i had to go grab something to eat and for a much needed break from the floor. but then i had to make sure that everyone was covered. after inhaling my food and giving report to the other nurse who was gonna be taking over for the admission that i made, i went back to the floor at 8pm. as soon as i asked my colleagues a quick update on the patients, i had to call blood bank for two patients who had an order for type and cross. only to find out that morning shift didn't send them the sufficient blood for the other one... so i had to do blood draw for two patients. one of them was such a hard stick, by the time i finished drawing blood it was already 8:45. just when i thought i could i finally be able to help out in giving out meds, ER calls for report for another admission. after taking report, i had to make the bed for that admission. then a family summons me to witness a patient signing some papers then checked for a consent for that blood transfusion. then 9:30 came and my second admission entered the floor. it was an easy admission though, for the patient was able to speak english and is alert and oriented. i finished my admission interview, picking up orders, give report to the nurse on that team by 10:45. then i had to go back to my team and clean up patients. we finished cleaning them up by 11:10. then i had to pick up an order for a medication and ask someone to hang it up for me. by 11:20 i gave report to a very unhappy night nurse.

yes... it was a crazy day and tomorrow is another day. i just hope and pray that i wouldn't be charge nurse tomorrow.

Please watch these.... and pass it on!

2007-09-12T00:40:00.000-04:00

A Weekend In Boston

2007-09-10T11:54:00.000-04:00

We left for Boston around 6 o'clock Saturday morning (after much delays) and arrived at around 10. Headed straight to the local diner and had some much needed caffeine and sugar to wake us up. After the pancakes and rounds of coffee, we navigated our way to Marriot Hotel, where we would be staying for the night. As soon as we got to the hotel we were so happy (and relieved) to be able to check-in earlier than the expected time. In the hotel room, we were wlecomed by the softest comforter one have ever felt. It was just like heaven after at least 20 hours of being out of bed and taking that sacral pressure ulcer-inducing ride. After resting for like two hours, we all dragged ourselves out of the comforts of the hotel and trekked our way to Boston Common.

After crossing a bridge and bumping into other tourists, we found ourselves at the beginning of the Freedom Trail, then our adventure began. We passed by old churches, graves of famous people (such as Ben Franklin's parents, Otis the elevator guy, burial ground of the Boston Massaccre), old buildings which were witness to the revolution and the declaration of Independence. Then we found ourselves by Quincy Market, and decided to have a feast at McCormick and Schmick's. It's at McCormick and Schmick's where our famine vanquished. We had the most delectable Lump Crab, Shrimp and Artichoke Dip with Pita and Calamari with three different sauces. Horacio enjoyed his Clam Chowder and Lobster Linguine, my brother had the Salmon with Brie (it sounds kinda weird but it was actually really yum-o!), I enjoyed my Red Tilapia with Cashew Crust and Jamaican Rub, Shao had Lump Crab Penne and Cary (was boring) with his Ceasar Salad and Crab Veggie Soup. After inhaling our food, we headed back to the hotel for some much needed rest. By 10 o'clock i started to crave for some Buffalo Wings and pizza. Horacio and my brother, graciously offered to go out to the corner and get some Domino's pizza and wings. As soon as they came back, I had fun with my wings and pouring hot sauce over my ham and pineapple pizza! It was just simply delicioso!! The wings and the pizza just ended our night and we all turned in.

By Sunday morning, we started our day with (quite disappointing) breakfast at Cosi and headed to MIT Museum for some (free!!) fun. I love museums that has hands on things. Things that you can actually manipulate and have fun with. MIT museum offered that to everyone! I felt I was back in elementary school once more and oh-so ready to explore the world. We saw these awesome holograms, things that were made not particularly to be used but just because. After a couple of hours in the museum we had to head back to the hotel to check ourselves out. After doing so, we headed to Harvard University but first, we had to find a local bar for Horacio so that he wouldn't miss his open season football game. We found ourselves in Uno's (which I can't complain, since I love Uno's!). We ordered wings, pizza and chocolate wow!!! As Horacio watched the game, we once again headed to Harvard University, tried to act as students in Harvard (tourism and film students!! haha). Did you know that the statue of that was there was not really John Harvard?? Nobody actually knew how he looked like!! Yeah, I sneaked into one of the tour groups and overheard this. Anyways, after visiting and roaming the vicinity of Harvard, we all headed back to the hotel and claimed our baggages and left for the bus terminal.

Before leaving Boston we had a pit stop for some pretzels and lemonade from Auntie Anne. We got back to New York around 10 o'clock at night adn ended our night with some soup, sushi, chicken fried rice and general tso's chicken.

Full Force Crew

2007-09-03T08:51:00.000-04:00

hey everyone! this is a little plug-in.. please check out the site www.rawvegas.tv and look for Full Force Crew Reality Blog. they only have one right now but they would be adding new once on a weekly basis (i think..). my cousin is in it and i have seen these guys (and girls) before. they just made me wanna throw myself on the floor! hehe but knowing me, i would just imagine myself doing it rather than break any bones! you could also check out their website at www.fullforcecrew.com. Enjoy!! :)

i should...

2007-09-03T00:55:00.000-04:00

... actually be be in bed right now getting my winks, but here i am contemplating whether to forego my hunger or eat something at this hour. it has been a habit for me (and horacio) to eat right after work, but i just lost the weight that i wanted and it is slowly creeping back once more!! also, i should be sleeping now for a (hopefully) fun day tomorrow. we are "hosting" our first barbecue party here at home. it won't be too much, just a couple of friends hanging around. horacio will be (as usual) the man of the grill. i would probably make something nice and yummy (pasta... dessert...). anyways, more details after tomorrow!

the weekend...

2007-08-26T21:01:00.000-04:00

although weekends had been limited, so far each weekend was spent really well. this weekend was spent with friends. nancy, marleni, emmanuel, horacio and i had dinner at marbella in bayside. since marleni has been craving for some good paella we decided on the place. it has been a while since we all got together. the last time we hang out with marleni and eman was during the memorial day weekend at coney island. the last time with nancy was a couple of weeks ago when we went to staten island for some denino's pizza and ralph's ice cream. but the last time that marleni and nancy saw each other? hmmm... yeah, we had to think really hard to remember when! lol

so, during dinner, we all caught up with each other's lives over a pitcher of sangria. the paella took almost half an hour to come, but the wait was well worth it. it was good, although i can't say that it was the best paella i've ever had, it was still good. after dinner, we all decided to do a drive through dunkin' donuts (which was across marbella) and get our fill for coffee. since emmanuel had to go to work, he had to drop us home right after that. as usual, with emmanuel as our driver and marleni our co-pilot, we got lost (with the directions from mapquest!!). it was expected, as usual (and yes, we are SO getting them a GPS for their wedding!). by the time we got home, we prepared horacio's birthday ice cream cake. marleni and nancy insisted on having candles and all since horacio wasn't around during his birthday and that they "missed" it.

after having our piece of horacio's birthday cake, we set-up to play board games. we played scene it! and horacio won twice!! but, in fairness, the second round of scene it was a really close game (we all caught up since horacio wasn't able to answer My Bestfriend's Wedding and There's Something About Mary) after much gloating, we moved on with cranium. horacio and i teamed up.. it was a close game, but horacio and i lost...

by 2 am, we all headed to bed... while marleni, nancy and i stayed up until 5 am talking and planning marleni's wedding. it's really fun planning a wedding, especially marleni's. since the first wedding that she's gonna be attending to is hers, she has no clue on what to do and that stresses her out. nancy and i suggested a couple things to her... although she had decided on the color (red...) and a church wedding. she still hasn't decided on the venue for the reception (outdoor or indoor?). then we all fell asleep, only to wake up early to get ready for church.

we all went to horacio's church. i have been attending horacio's church for the past two weeks. although i have been there befere that, somehow, i have been enjoying his church more. i find myself going out and actually remember what the pastor talked about or actually understand what the verse is about. i dunno... anways, after church, nancy had to go home to staten island since she still had to go to work (us trying to convince her to call in sick didn't work). the three of us headed to Uno's for some lunch where eman joined us. after having our fill for lunch... the two guys voted off the movies (although at first horacio was all up for it!!! argh!!). instead we headed to my place and played a round of cranium (horacio and i ruled!!), watched chappelle's show. then it was time for marleni and eman to leave. i was so tired by then... and horacio had to leave me as well, which sucked big time.. but anyways..

it was still a good weekend. i had a good time hanging out with friends... it was fun staying up again and just talk about everything. it's nice that no matter how busy our lives had been that we still keep in touch and found ways to get together even for a short while. i am hoping for more times like this to come...

health update..

2007-08-24T17:14:00.001-04:00

so, i went to my doctor this morning. after asking me a series of questions and drawing my blood, he told me that he is trying to rule out ulcer, gastritis, gall stones or GI bleed. as soon as i heard GI bleed, i knew i could be in trouble. good thing i was fasting and didn't have enough time to pass by dunkin donuts on the way to his office, so he had me go to sonogram of the abdomen. now, he had me take nexium for the next ten days. if the pain doesn't go away by tuesday, i have to call him. if the pain goes away after the ten days, and comes back as soon as i stop taking nexium, i have to call him as well, and see if i could be scheduled for endoscopy. i am hoping now that the pain goes away and stays away... the reason why i didn't wanna go in the first place is because i know how thorough he is, and i know he is gonna suggest endoscopy. just the thought of it... i know i don't want to endure! still, i went and follow doctor's order (which includes, staying away from work until tuesday!!). i went for my sonogram and went home (after buying some new clothes and DS games).

i got home around 1:30 in the afternoon, by 1:45 pm my phone rings -- my doctor is calling. he wanted to let me know that he got the results of my sonogram and everything looks clear. that's a relief. but i still have to continue with the nexium and report any (or none of it) results. i called the nursing office already and called out for monday... now, i am just praying that the pain does go away in a couple of days.... i have seen how endoscopy is done, and i really don't want to go through it. (but) as my doctor said: "Don't be a hero. i know you are a healthcare worker (nurse) and i know that we are the worst patients." so.... we shall see....

shoesies... shoesies.. shoesies...

2007-08-23T23:28:00.000-04:00

when i used to go to work in an office, i used to detest wearing shoes with heels. i found them so uncomfortable, unnecessary and unbearable. i longed for wearing sneakers and flip-flops each day. now that i get to wear comfortable sneakers each day, i find myself looking through pumps and slingbacks. i recently bought this nice pair of four-inch black pump shoes in miami and each time i look at it, i long to wear it outside. now, i need a reason to be able to wear these type of shoes... as i browse through piperlime.com, i find myself going through the shoes with heels and foregoing the flats and flip-flops. am i actually growing up? or is it just because i don't get to wear them often so now it's ok to have them? just like the charater in the movie "in her shoes", she has all these nice pumps, sandals in different colors and styles, yet she doesn't wear them often and prefers to wear her "shabby" looking shoes. opinions anyone?

i long to have these shoes...... shall i buy them?? i really like the black and white one, and the red one... argh!! i want to go out... to be able to wear them!

on calling in...

2007-08-23T20:26:00.000-04:00

i am not really a bigg fan of calling in from work. even back when i was still in school, i would feel bad not going to school even if i am really sick and can't get out of bed. i remember one time, when i was on my second year in high school, i got really sick and i was tryi to get out of bed get ready for school since we were gonna have a test in biology. my sister had to pin me down (which was easy, since i was sick and weak) and assure me that it was ok that i stay at home. i also remember crying myself to sleep that time. thinking about it now makes me sound nerdy!! who would want to go to school for a test?!?!

anyways, today i called in (again..) and i felt so bad. although, i know that if i went to work i would just be in pain and wouldn't really be that beneficial, since work requires me to run up and down the hall, turn and move patient up the bed, continually remind patients not to get out of bed -- and that is just an eighth of what we regularly do. i have a real reason why i didn't go though. and most people at work knew about it, since i came to work yesterday. i don't exactly know what it is yet, but i have been having a bad feeling on my stomach for the past two days. i have been feeling dull pain on my stomach with occassional sharp pains. as i tried to explain to horacio how the pain is... it's like having contractions (i think!). since it's so painful and that's the only thing i could think of on how to describe it. i tried to rule out a lot of things... it's not caused by spicy food (since i just had indian food last night and buffalo wings today and it didn't make it feel any worse) and not of soda (which i just had a couple of glasses, and nothing). i don't know about coffee though, but i am not drinking any of those at the moment. i don't think it's an ulcer, since i still have the appetite to eat, and it doesn't go away after i eat. what's worse, i get nauseaus after eating (but that doesn't stop me). it can't be GERD since i tried to drink milk and not a gallon of milk alleviates the pain. it's not gas, since i took maalox as well... i haven't had any episodes of vomiting or diarrhea.... so, i really have no clue what's going on with me. but, i finally caved in and called my doctor today... i was hoping that he would see me earlier today, but i knew it was a far shot. so, i would be seeing him tomorrow instead. i am now hoping that he'd give me a note, since i took two days off from work plus this weekend is my weekend off... i know the supervisors are just gonna love reprimanding me.

on the lighter side of what's going on with my life... well... what can i say... the weather had been pretty sucky these past few days. it has been gloomy, rainy and cold!! and to think summer is not officially over yet!!! i love summer... please, sun, come out again!! actually, i don't mind the less humid days, it's the rain that bugs me the most! i like rain, but i don't like it when i have to leave the house. i like it when i could just stay at home, lay in my bed, watch some movies, hear the pitter patter of the rain on the window, eat lots of junk foods or a nice bowl of soup! i guess i just got used to the rain in the Philippines. for when it rains, it meant no one is allowed outside the house unless you want to get stuck in the middle of somewhere.

work has been alright... i really can't complain. i don't hate my job. i kinda enjoy it! (lol) i know, it sounds weird. but as most people know, one can't have everything in life. i enjoy taking care of people and to actually know that i am helping people, makes me feel good. i know it sounds so cheesy and cliche, but this is really what made me want to become a nurse - to help people and know that i made someone smile each day. well... what can't make you smile when an old, sweet lady tells you that you are an angel just for re-positioning her? i dunno... maybe it's just me... i adore most of my patients. some of them could be such a pain in the you-know-where (especially the family)... but life isn't perfect. i know i still groan about going to work and wish that i don't have to work... i also have bad days, but then i think about my old job... then the bad days ain't so bad anymore! :)

anyways, i better stop babbling nonsense... but i am sure my mom's gonna love this post since it's lengthy! hehehe (i love you mom, i know that you are my avid reader, eventhough you don't know how to post a comment!). got to prepare myself for tomorrow... getting sticked and probed! i hate needles!!!

for mom...

2007-08-21T17:06:00.000-04:00

as requested by my mother dearest, i am blogging right now. so..................................................................................................

hi mom!! you better accept realities. hehehe maybe one day this year, you'd meet your first blue eyed (or green!) grand kid! :)

i love you mother!! :)

Hilarious!!!

2007-08-11T21:11:00.000-04:00

Warning: This is to be viewed by those who can understand the Ilonggo language.

The Sunshine State

2007-07-31T11:27:00.000-04:00

Day One:

after four hours of sleep, three-hour plane ride, Horacio and I found ourselves in Miami, Florida. took a cab and headed to Beach Place Hotel. since we were starving and the heat wouldn't do us good with our empty stomach, we decided to just order in. upon having our fill, we headed to the beach for a quick get-to-know the area. as soon as we got the beach (which is a block away from where we were staying). lighting began, so we headed back to hotel before it poured. by 7pm, it was still pouring, but our tummy is yet again screaming for food. we got ready and planned to take a bus, but decided against it after realizing how bad the rain was. we took a cab, headed down to ocean drive. we had dinner at Mango (which was like Cafe Wha with a South Beach twist). it was a nice, sorta-weird experience for both of us, since we were dining by the sidewalk... usually in new york, outside dining is always full that you don't get the chance to do it. we had our pina colada, apple martini, amaretto sour and long island ice tea... it was the beginning of our vacation.

Day Two:

Had our first taste of Miami sun. it was shining brightly and warmly. the water was nice and refreshing. we soaked the sun and forgot all about the world. we were in paradise. after much sun and water soaking, we freshened up and headed once more to downtown. had lunch at johnny rockets and headed to little havana. it felt like we were the only ones that was walking around to get to our destination. once in little havana, we asked around the locals for the walk of fame, and they seemed surprise after finding out that we were just walking. we took the bus, walked around. had the taste of kings cream's mango ice cream. it was the most delicious ice cream (aside the one from philippines) that i have ever tasted. it was just so light and it tasted like the real fruit itself that was left in the fridge and served minus the seed and the peel. after completing the walk of fame. we dined at a mexican restaurant. it was so delicious, had the mango margarita - heavenly! went back to the hotel, just in time when the rain started to pour.

Day Three:

Horacio's Birthday!!! for his special day, we woke up pretty early and was picked up by Victor of Miami-Dade County Parks at 9 am and headed to the other side of Miami beach for our Eco-Adventure Kayaking and Snorkeling Tour. we were blessed with a wonderful weather. kayaking was a lot of work, we got left behind for the first part, but learned and caught up. Winston, our guide, was so nice and guided us through. the tour ended at 1 pm, Victor once again drove us back to our hotel, just in time for the rain to start pouring once more. by 7 pm, the rain subsided, horacio and i headed out to downtown once again to have dinner at Cafe Med. where we had lobster, paella, mango daquiri and banana daquiri. horacio had his birthday (key lime) pie!! after dinner we strolled around ocean drive, passed by the place where versace was killed. got back to the hotel just in time for the rain the pour once again.

Day Four:

Got up at 8am and headed out to the beach for one last time. spent an hour and headed back to the hotel to finish packing up. after checking out, we left our luggage by the receptionist, and headed to the local hang-outs. had lunch at a cuban restaurant, had horacio his fill of dunkin donuts coffee and mine of their sobe coolata. we walked our way back to the hotel, going through the Northshore Open Park, where they had a health trail. upon arriving back in the hotel and lounging around their lobby, horacio and i bid farewell and headed to the airport.

Epilogue:

After four days in Miami, i fell in love with the place. the weather was just perfect, the place was wonderful, the food so sumptuous. it was so laid back. it was a great way spending horacio's birthday. we got time away from our busy, stressful lives in new york. now we are back in the realities of our world. with this, i know that we could, i could, take vacations and really enjoy it. i love my life. i feel so happy and very much blessed. God really sees us through. if not for Him, we wouldn't have the pleasure of enjoying and savoring His work. if not for Him, we wouldn't be blessed with great weather. because of Him, we are safe.

argh!!

2007-07-26T13:18:00.000-04:00

i know i should start packing and get ready for work. yet, here i am trying to find some "stories" opinions on the harry potter book 7. i finished it last night (or should i say, this morning). i haven't had my nice 9 hour sleep since monday. i so wanna discuss the book with someone! but i am afraid by the time the people around me finishes the book, i would have moved on from it.... argh!!!

anyways... can't wait for this weekend!!! :")

two and a half days...

2007-07-17T11:50:00.000-04:00

the weekend was started off with stuffed french toast, pancakes, bacons, sausage links, hash browns, eggs and coffee at ihop. then off we continued on our way to connecticut. it was a much awaited weekend after a stressfull week. spent most of the day saturday under the sun, learning how to make brazos de mercedes and taking naps. when the whole family arrived, we ended saturday by heading out to loews theatre for the much awaited harry potter and the order of phoenix. the movie was great and just the way i imagined as i was reading the book. especially the part where the weasley twins had their fireworks display during OWLs exams. it was really great! summer movie of the year? well, for me it's a toss up between that and transformers. (still have to see rattatouille!!).

sunday came... woke up with keilbasa, eggs, spam, rice and diet pepsi. what a great way to start a day. then off we went and played once more under the sun. did some moonsaults under the water... we did our way of "synchronized" swimming. it was a lot of fun! had our surf and turf grill. shrimps, tilapia, ribs, steaks, pickled veggies, using your hands as utensils... 100% yum!! even the three dogs were having the time of their lives! then we all headed back to the city and anxiously waited for monday to come.

monday morning came. horacio woke me up early for a "surprise" lunch date. as we took the train to our destination, horacio then tells me that we were off to smith and wollensky. i couldn't summer up the excitement since all my brain cells must have still been sleeping, but once we got there i was all excited! i haven't had a good steak for a while... and the place is just known for their steaks!!! so we had our appetizers (gazpacho for him, salad for me). our main course - juicy, tender, filet mignon (medium rare for both of us!!) with a side of mashed potatoes (his) and baked potatoe (mine!!). we ended up with chocolate mousse cake (his) and with the really delicious bourbon pecan pie (mine, again!!). we both headed back home dreading to go back to work.

as soon as i stepped into my floor... i knew that my weekend was really over. i was the nurse in charge, team leader, only rn on my side, had five discharges and an admission. i just can't wait for the next weekend off... (florida!!)

days... weeks... months...

2007-07-06T11:58:00.000-04:00

first week of july is almost over. time flies so fast. it was just june... now the summer is almost about to end.

june had been a crazy month... well, every month has their own craziness. eversince i have been off orientation (work) and had my alternate weekends to work, time flew more faster.

a month of june rundown...

first week of june:

1. planned a get together (although it really wasn;t my idea, and the person who thought of it didn't show up). marichu brought cranium, the girls ruled. we had fun eating and drinking.

2. had my first taste of philippine independence day parade. although we missed the parade itself, we dived right into the (overpriced) food and some souvenirs.

3. a friend came over early morning and enjoyed a good breakfast together. since our schedule always clash, it was the only perfect time to meet and catch up.

second week of june:

nothing much really happened... since i worked that weekend. although we did go to cafe wha with some of my bro's friends. cafe wha, i think, had been our "comfort club" if there's such a thing. it's just fun to be there, no matter how many times you've seen or heard their act.

third week of june:

went to connecticut over the weekend. it was nice and relaxing. not really worrying about anything. got my nice tan (which hopefully would last me throughout the year again!). my mom enjoyed having all of us there. took in the sun and refreshed myself in the pool's cold water.

last week of june, was mommy chi's baby shower! in between all those things that i have been doing, each available time i got was spent planning for mommy chi's baby shower. it was planned to be held at her sister's place. unfortunately, there was no way of kicking her out of the place so we could prepare the place. so, we ended up having it in my place. although she knew that we were planning a baby shower fro her, she never guessed that it was gonna be on the day that i invited her over for another get together (since a friend of ours was in europe when we had the get together earlier that month). we had games that made everyone laugh. i had them paint on bibs and onsies as a "gift" for baby gavin. even sophie (her 2 year old niece painted a bib for her!). i also made cupcakes which were simply sweet and delicious.

now... the first week of july is near its end. i celebrated fourth of july doing overtime in the hospital. which i am glad i did, since it was quiet (meaning, no admissions nor discharges). we ordered pizza for dinner and some patients saw the fireworks by the lounge. it hasn't been a great fourth of july week though, since the weather has been so gloomy. it doesn't feel like summer.

yesterday, horacio and i joined my brother and his guests to todai for a brunch/lunch buffet. it was such a yummy treat. too bad, my tummy isn't just not up for eating at that hour anymore. after good lunch, we parted ways... planned to go up the empire state building, but decided not to at the last minute and just headed to kips bay loews theatre to watch transformers.

at first, the idea of transformers didn't really tickle me. i didn't really grew up with transformers so i don't know transformers. but few minutes into the movie i couldn't bare to leave my seat. i was holding my pee until i couldn't anymore and had to dash to the restroom! i didn't want to miss any part of it! it was such a nice movie. i fell in love with bumble bee!! i want a bumble bee. maybe when i get my first car, i would name it bumble bee (and paint it yellow?). we also planned on watching ratatouille after transformers (two movies in one day!) but opted not to. since we got out of the theatre really exhausted that we had to drag ourselves to the subway station.

as soon as we got home, my brother and his guests were already home (since they were going to leave for boston at 12 midnight). for dinner, we all went to have good filipino food at tito rads. it's been a while since we ate there. the food was still good (if not, better) and the ambience is still not tacky (just like the other filipino restaurant). we all went home satisfied.

time do run so fast... in few mimutes i would be getting ready and heading out for work... next weekend... connecticut once more! hoping for nice warm weather. by the end of this month, horacio and i would basking under miami's sun!!

until then...

sad talaga...

2007-07-04T11:55:00.000-04:00

i saw this from Chi's blog, i wondered how i would do. it's really sad to know that i have lived a good amount of time in the philippines and not really seeing the philippines. i guess that's one of my plans/goals in life... to travel philippines more (aside from traveling different parts of the globe). i love philippines and i know that it has a lot to offer. there are a lot of tourist spots and things to do, yet i never took advantage of it.

well... life is just starting... so, in time i hope to visit more places.

My Lakbayan grade is F!

How much of the Philippines have you visited? Find out at Lakbayan!

Created by Eugene Villar.

2007-06-29T06:11:00.001-04:00

thoughts...

2007-06-25T06:41:00.000-04:00

here i am, been awake since 0530. i got home at around 0030, went to bed at 0130. i waws dreaming, sleepng peacefully when a thought (or was it a dream?) about work woke me up. i now have this naging feeling that i forgot to do something for the admission that i did yesterday. although it is something really minor, it's those minor things that gets you (especially in my line of work). i am tempted to call work and find out if i did put in and finish filling that one piece of paper out (which the info could actually be seen in the main chart). i don't know.. what if i didn't? should i pass by work today and do it? just for that one piece of paper? if if didn't and joint commission do come today, would i get in really deep trouble? these thoughts have been killing me.. on the other hand, i have a feeling that i did fill out the form. another little man in my head told me that i did fill it out, that i did put in the info. besides, if i didn't do it, why wouldn't the other nurse in charge of that team let me know? she would have notice if that folder wasn't at the bedside, wouldn't she?

this thing has actually been going on... i would be going home tired. doing a final mental task checklist before i leave the floor and go home realizing i forgot to do one minor thing. thank God it's only minor. i haven't been coming home nad realizing i neglect to notify a doctor about patient's status, or omit any substantial medication.

i know i am not alone in this paranoia world. i know colleagues of mine who also dream of work and think nothing but work. even on a day off. yes, i got no life (although, i still would like to think i do!).

from the time that i have started to work, i have been good in leaving work in the office after office hours until now. i may come home stress but i don't dream about it nor think about it on a day off.

work aside, life has been treating me well. i really can't complain, with the blessings that i am receiving. i am actually more thankful that He is keeping me sane and letting me keep my head up no matter how hard/stressful work could be. after all, it's only eight hours of work...

i really need a break!!! just let these cobwebs off my head! i have to stop thinking of work. shopping may be a good therapy... oh boy...

You've Got to Watch This!!!

2007-06-12T21:02:00.000-04:00

the weekend that was...

2007-06-03T22:58:00.001-04:00

Food, Scrabble and CRANIUM!!

saturday was spent hanging out at home with friends, food and lots of laughter. although not all people came.. it was still spent with great friends. we had some filipino food (courtesy of tito rads... thank God for a filipino restaurant that is so close to our place!) and as requested.. the chocolate cake courtesy of marichu! :)

we did our usual scrabble... which we only did a round of.. played a little wii... and ended the night with cranium! it was a battle of the genders! and of course, as predicted, the women prevailed! :) i gotta give credit to the guys though.. the put up a good fight! :)

thanks marichu for introducing cranium.. another board game to be added on my list!! thanks michelle for coming!! :) i am really glad that you were able to make it, eventhough you have to travel all the way from the bronx.. i know it wasn't easy. thank you so much! cary!! thank you for sparing us with your time. :) to those who came for whatever reason... whatever. hehehe

**********

Philippine Independence Day Parade!

after seven years of being here in new york, i was finally able to witness the Philippine Independence Day parade. although, i wasn't able to catch the parade itself, it was still nice being on the fair. went with horacio... who at first said no to it and at the last minute, finally gave in. (thank you spazzie!!). you really know you were in a filipino function since -- food, money sending places, food, booths for nurses, and did i mention food??

i was quite disappointed though, since there wasn't much booths to buy stuff. i think it would have been nicer to have those philippine products around. plus, the stuff they sell (even the food) are really expensive. it didn't stop me from buying a shirt and a beaded necklace with the flag on it. it was jsut really for the fun of it. i tried to get a good bargain, but they woouldn't budge. the designs on the shirts are really cool though. i wish they had more small sizes... don't they realize they need more smaller sizes since they are catering to fillipinos?? if you want, you can check out their shirts here and here.

it was a fun day until it started raining... i was exhausted as soon as we got home... thanks spazzou for coming out to the parade with me. although people were still mistaking me to be a non-filipino... it was still fun. :)

Memorial Day in Coney Island

2007-05-29T12:56:00.001-04:00

we did it again! horacio and i spent another Memorial Day in Coney Island. this time with family and friends. the plan was to meet up in coney island at around one in the afternoon. the family, me and horacio drove down to coney island. as soon as we parked, marichu and rich were already there waiting for us. horacio and i left the family (they decided to eat first) to go meet up with marichu and rich and find us a spot in beach. the sun was shining, cool breeze blowing.. we set up our blankies and put some sunblock on. we caught up with each other.. soaked under the sun and played some dominoes. around 3 pm, wench, horacio and i decided to test the water.. it was ice cold!! so we stayed away.. well, except for wench who was brave enough to go under the water! as soon as we got back to our spot, marleni started to call. this was around 3:30 - she was two hours late.. but was forgiven, since she took lynette with her. marichu left at around 4 to go to another function, then the family left. the four of us and lynette were left on the beach.. we were throwing sand to lynette and at one point, while emmanuel was feeding lynette with some cherries, lynetter just decided to throw sand into his face! around seven, we headed out for some nathan's hotdog. after that, horacio and marleni went and braved the cyclone. horacio went twice!! then off we went to kiddie park for lynette.. horacio won some stuff toys... which lynette ignored. by 9:30pm... we decided to call it a night...but before we did, we bought funnel cakes!! :)

it was nice day altogether... sun, beach, hotdogs, laughter, and funnel cakes!! :)

HELP!!!!

2007-05-26T01:41:00.000-04:00

I can't decide which phone to get.... T-Mobile Dash or the new T-Mobile Wing. Both phones have what I have been looking for (Windows MObile --- allowing be to edit Excel, for me to manage my account...). I am so torn!!!! T-Mobile Dash has faster CPU processing than the Wing... I like how the Wing looks like. The Wing is still new, so there's really no way for me to get a feedback. I only read reviews about it, and it was good. I also like how the Wing looks like, but I don't know how long will I stand having a bulky phone. Same goes with the Dash, yes it is slim, but it's wide! I like the touch screen feature of the Wing... I just don't know... help!! anyone??

it's official...

2007-05-23T10:49:00.000-04:00

We headed out early morning yesterday to Cadman Plaza in Brooklyn to swear in... my brother and I are now citizens of the United States.

Although it took all morning, what could have been a two-hour thing. We left the courthouse pledging our allegiance to the flag of the United States. There were about two hundred people in that courthouse. For some, we wondered how they were able to obtain or pass their interviews since they couldn't even speak or understand English. Some people were answering "yes" to questions that doesn't apply to them. It's just weird... the immigration made it sound like a big deal that you have to be able to read, speak and write English to be able to pass the interview... yet...

So much for that... me, mom and my bro went to our old neighborhood to pick up mom's car. It took us about an hour to get there... the neighborhood still looks the same, same crowd. Memories came flooding back and quickly we had to get out.

What we did to celebrate the day being a citizens? We had lunch at a Filipino restaurant, Horacio and I called in sick from work, ate a lot of junk food, watched Music and Lyrics. :) It was a great way to spend the day. :)

My New Toy!!

2007-05-19T14:03:00.000-04:00

after almost three weeks of no digi cam... i finally got a new one!! thanks to my bro for checking out the warranty and thoe things.. i got my new Canon SD800IS (plus 1Gig SD card and extra battery) only for $40!!! :) it's so nice and sleek! although it's a little bit thicker than my old one.. it takes much better pictures!! here are some of the first random shots that i took... :)

i so love it!! :) now... to look for underwater casing and a nice casing that would prevent me from scratching it really badly in few weeks....

Happy Nurses Week

2007-05-09T10:04:00.000-04:00

in celebration of nurses week... Elmhurst had all the nurses wear all white yesterday and to wear a nurse's cap. at first i was planning on going against the grain, since i don't have a white top and i don't have a nurse's cap. the other day, another co-worker of mine came up to me and had me "donate" $5 for a nurse's cap so that i could have something for yesterday. how can i say no to her when she asked me right the exact moment when our supervisor was next to us?? so... i ended up shelling out $5. the following morning, i just wore my colored top and last on the last minute, decided to pass by the store that sells nursing uniform. i decided to buy a fairly nice white top... as soon as i got to work, i was thankful for that last minute decision. everyone (but one) was dressed in white on our floor and most of them were wearing the cap. as soon as i entered the lounge, one of the nurses there was so excited about the whole thing that it was so contagious. ended up wearing a cap.

this is me, during my break in the nurses lounge... unfortunately, i no longer own a digicam (it broke...). i am now just waiting for a co-worker of mine to send me the pictures that she took.

all in all... the experience was nice. :)

first day off orientation

2007-05-08T10:28:00.000-04:00

i am (finally) off orientation. i survived the grueling eye (and tapping foot) of my nursing educator and gained a good reputation on the floor (or so well i think). yesterday was my first day on evening shift (3pm to 11:30pm). it was heaven. i was able to sleep and stay in bed until 10 in the morning. had lunch and took an hour and a half nap before getting ready for work and still get to the hospital a good 15 minute early. as soon as i got to the floor, the people in morning shift greeted me well and gave me a vote of confidence. i also had a small chat with the clerk in the morning shift, and his comment was right. you see, i was in the morning shift friday leaving me the rest of the day and weekend off until monday morning. it felt like a long weekend. if only horacio wasn't working that weekend...

anyways... when 3pm came, the head nurse pulled me aside... uh-oh. she started off by telling me how sorry she was to pair me up with the nurse i would be working with that night. at first i was like -- it's ok, no problem. then she goes to me "no, you don't understand. this is no smiling matter." yet i was still smiling.. but this time i know that it was a nervous one. then she goes on telling me how i should be careful when working with her since she is cunning and tends to assign patients unfairly. after few minutes of talking and telling me who to go to when i need someone and who would/could stand up for me i went back to the nurse's lounge. in there i found both people from evening and day shift. as soon as they learned that i would be working with that very nurse, they started to open their mouths. as in everyone, including the clerk! i was starting to get scared. then another co-orientee of mine, who started the day before, also told me to be careful. she had that nurse the other day and she is so cunning.

then it was time to start... i was in charge of the narcotic key that evening, so i started counting with the nurse from the day shift. when that was done, i took report from the nurse. turned out i have four, she has three and the lpn has four. it was ok, since (at that time) two of my patients were scheduled to be discharged. after taking report, i went to my patients room, did vitals, neuro checks... and all the tasks that i have to do. i come back to the nurse's station and started to work on my discharges.

after two discharges, the two other patients started to give me hell. they both want to go home and we have been paging the doctor to no avail. they both changed into their street clothes and i was afraid that one of them would leave the floor without me knowing. after what seemed like thousands of attempts, the doctor finally called. this time, one of my patients are no where to be found. i started to panick, what only comforted me is the fact that he left his jacket in the room. after going back and forth into the patient's room, i finally found him lying in bed (turned out, he went out for a smoke!) smiling. i nearly strangled him! so, i told him because of him leaving the floor like that he missed the chance to speak to the doctor and can't complain if it took another hour or so for the doctor to call back.

by 7pm, it was time for me to go for my dinner break (i have to get used to saying this, instead of lunch break!). i told the nurse about the situation (as what we are supposed to do). she told me she'd do the discharge if necessary. [one of the patients is going home against medical advice - more paperwork... and the other one is a regular discharge]. i was having dinner and was on the phone, she comes in and asks me to sign the form for her. stupid me, i signed the form. then the evening clerk (thank God for her) came in and told me that i shouldn't have done that and that she would do something to get me in trouble and she would lie it. so, as to fix the problem, i went out and told her i would do the discharge myself since i already signed for it (this time i didn't have the appetite to eat at all!). she insisted on doing it herself... and eventually gave in. telling everyone that she tried to help. as i was doing that discharge, this other guy (same guy who left the floor) came up and ask me where his papers were. since he was a regular discharge we were waiting for the discharge summary to be on the computer (done by the doctors). i explained to him what's going on... another nurse and the clerk came to my rescue and tried to explain things to him for me since, i think, they sense my frustration. after giving the papers to the other guy, explaining to him once more the consequences of him leaving and the whole nine yards. i went back to the lounge and took a breather. the nurse came in once more, this time with the discharge papers of the other guy. i was on the phone with horacio (again) and she asked me to sign the papers. this time, i told her that i wouldn't sign it since i wouldn't be doing it and i am on a break. she told me it was no big deal and that she would do it. i replied by saying if she doesn't want to sign it, leave it and i will do it when i come back from my break (by this time, the patient was outside and really getting annoying!). then another nurse comes in (oh God, how thankful i am for her!) and told her that the policy is that if you did it you sign it, no matter if it's your patient or not (her defense was that it wasn't her patient). she left the room and did the discharge and came back again asking me to verify all that she wrote and sign for it. i look at the other nurse for help, she signaled to me that it's ok to sign. so, i signed... she left. after the break, i went up and finished all the discharges -- charting, putting all the papers together. by 9pm i had no patients. i was praying that there would be no admissions or if there would be to come really early or by 10:45. since the policy is that if a patient comes to the floor by 10:45 the admission is done by the night shift. at 9:30, i got a call from ER, giving me report for a patient. i took the report. hoped that the patient would come up soon or at 10:45. the rest of the time i fixed the bed for that patient i took report from and hang-out. 10:40 came, the nurse told me that i wouldn't be doing the admission anymore. then the patient came. she announced to everyone that the patient came at 10:45, wrote it down. all i did was take vitals.

11:00pm came... night shift people nowhere to be found.... 11:15 they started to come in. by 11:20 i was counting narcotics again with the incoming night nurse. 11:45pm i left the floor.

it was an experience that i was... weird. although all the evening nurses said that it was really an unusual night, since we had at least six empty bed and only one admission came in. usually it was discharge and admission, left and right. i actually don't know what to take from that nurse... i know i have to be careful when i am working with her. and although the word "team", "teamwork" or "teamplayer" is not in her vocabulary or the fact that she is cunning and a liar... and everybody on that floor knows that. i know that one day she would learn her lesson. i know that one day she would realized why people doesn't like to work with her. i just hope that as i (or, if i) continue to work with her, i would have that guts to say something. since, i have the tendency to help people out and all... i guess this time i would have to say no.

on being a nurse.

2007-04-08T00:43:00.000-04:00

i had just signed off my six-week evaluation. all i could say is that i am happy with the results. i can't believe it, (more than) six weeks had passed since i started.

so far, it had been somewhat stressful. with waking up in really early in the morning and trying to be there for all patients. everyday has brought me new knowledge, learning new "tricks" on how to get a job done more efficiently. it is true what they say, the only time you learn nursing is when you are on job. on some parts, i feel like i haven't learned anything from nursing school, on the other, it's all just a review with some differences.

i am not gonna lie, but i am enjoying my job. although it's a lot of work and stress, my stress level and stamina had changed since my previous job. i don't go home depress, i don't really have to drag myself out of the bed and through the day. the patients may be old and, for most of them, incontinent. it brightens up my day when i enter a patient's room and here them say "oh! am i glad to see you!" or "please tell me you're my nurse today?". it's also a trip when we have spanish-only speaking patients. as i try to communicate with the little spanish words that i learn, i get smiles from them. i feel that they appreciate the effort that i put into trying to communicate with them. a patient once taught me how to say some words. horacio once passed by my floor, his comment - "you're patients are cute! i thought you just make them sound cute with your stories!" yes, i share stories with them, but still keeping in mind patient's privacy (no names, nothing really specific). also, i enjoy the people that i work with. we joke around, we help each other out. i am so gonna miss the people on the day shift once i start evenings. i can actually feel the teamwork.

everyday has been a learning experience for me. may our floor be over-staffed or under. it has been a wonderful experience so far. all this, of course, was made possible by the Lord. i hope and pray it countinues as days, weeks, months, years go by.

to get or not to get... that is the question.

2007-03-29T21:41:00.000-04:00

i have been going back and forth in my decision about getting a new phone. most the phones that i've had is either a hand-me-down or free. i have been looking through t-mobile's phones and there are two phones that i am eyeing... the T-Mobile MDA or the Blackberry Pearl. this time, neither one is free nor a hand-me-down. the MDA is actually $250 and the Pearl $200... am i really ready to spend so much for a phone??? knowing me, i would scratch it so badly and probably drop it numerous of time.. is it worth it?? or maybe the reason why i don't really mind dropping my phone is because i didn't pay a single cent on it.. maybe paying $250 on a phone will make a difference...

another thing is that the size... i saw someone with the mda earlier, and it's not that bad. i like it. no, i REALLY like it.

should i get it or not??

life.

2007-03-28T19:30:00.000-04:00

i was about to have dinner, when i got a message from an old co-worker of mine about a friend who is now in coma. i called him back immediately, and found out that she and her boyfriend went to boston to snowboard.

i was in shock. i couldn't believe what i heard. memories of her just flashed through me like a slideshow. it's so hard to imagine her being in that state. we may not be that close, but memories are there.

somehow i still can't imagine how sudden a life could be. although i have experienced it on the floor (hospital), encountering patients who are very much alert, few days after that they are just spiraling down. then again, i have elderly patients. it's just so hard to imagine someone my age in a critical condition. i guess, this just proves that i really can't work for pediatrics.

it's just surreal. life, sometimes, could be so surreal.

i just pray for her and her family, to have the courage during this trying times.

brain diarrhea... (no pun intended)

2007-03-26T21:38:00.000-04:00

yes... it's been a while since i have blogged.

let me re-phrase that -- it's been a while since i have been online.

i got a call from a friend the other day. she just got back from philippines a couple of weeks ago. she figured out that i have started working in a hospital since i havent't been online for quite a while now.

it's weird how i used to be online almost 24/7, read random people's blog nad the news each morning, blog almost each day... until i have attained a position in the health care.

well, one thing, there is no internet in the hospital. the online online resource we could avail there is the intranet, micromedex and to page the doctor. another thing, even if there was internet available on the floor, it's not like you have at least ten minutes to stay in front of the computer to surf the web! ok, so you can sit in front of the computer for 20 minutes, but those times are devoted into checking if there are any "new orders" or things that has to finalized for a patient. even then, you would be called into a patient's room to do something, or begin giving medications and by the time you get back to the computer, someone else is using it. the ratio and proportion of computers to healthcare workers are really off!

then again, i couldn't really complain. i love my job. i enjoy the patients and the people that i work with. i enjoy being able to talk to the patients and hear their life stories. i am also guilty for enjoying being asked my age and getting compliments that i look really young for my age or that they have a son that is single and looking (hahaha).

on the other side, i miss being online. i haven't heard from my sister since... i don't know when. and yes, we (the three of us) have blog, yet everyone seems to be so busy lately that no one has ever updated it, except for the occassional greetings and very rare rants. i haven't really spoken to my mom. everytime she calls, it's either i am working or i am already asleep. i know.. it's sad.

i guess that's why i have been thinking about getting a blackberry (or the likes). i want to stay in touch my family. but, then again.. would i really be able to use it when i am on the floor? e-mail maybe? then, what's the use of having internet at home?? on top of that, there is the additional monthly payment for me to have that IM and e-mail capabalities on my phone. is it really worth it?

i don't know.... but right now, i just feel like i have lost in touch with a lot of people.

*********

look at the time now... better get some sleep.

made me all giddy inside...

2007-02-24T08:48:00.000-05:00

as we started our day yesterday on the floor, i got a message from horacio saying that our checks are already in! i couldn't believe it, since they said that it we won't get paid until the 9th of March!! then, i got another message saying that he and maria got their checks already!! when we had to leave the floor to attend a vascular access class, i headed down to where they distribute the checks... after signing for it and seeing it in my own hands, i couldn't help but smile. a paycheck that would allow me to pay my bills and still have enough to put into my savings account and for myself. -- first giddy moment! :)

then, i went around with a rn (a different one this time) to check on the patients (vital signs, morning rounds). the nurse let me do some charting and when i had to initial and print my name and title next to it, i felt happy. i need not to put SN (student nurse) next to my name, instead RN!! -- my heart got so giddy, seeing an RN next to my name.. :)

come 8 o'clock, our clinical instructor came in and handed us small envelopes. inside the envelope is our OWN datakey. i had to retain myself from jumping up and down. i know, i am weird and shallow.. it's just a key! but the key somehow made things real... we set it up with our password.. we can now access our patient's charts on the computer!! :) -- another giddy moment! :)

i know, these things may seem too shallow... but for me, it makes me feel like i really have accomplished something in my life. i am officially a registered nurse, i got my first (nice)paycheck and the key just made things more real... :)

********

although some of my co-orientees weren't too happy with their checks and were surprised when i told them that i wasn't. why would i be disappointed when i got paid for sitting in the classroom for eight hours?? maybe when i am on the actual floor... but still, i am staying optimistic. :)

what's been happenning...

2007-02-22T17:01:00.000-05:00

today i started on the unit where i would be working for. although all i did the whole was shadow a RN around, it was exhausting! i felt like i was back in nursing school where we couldn't touch anything and all we are allowed to do was ask the RN questions... i wasn't even able to give out meds! but, it was kind of a relief too. i now experience the going-ons in the unit and how they "teams" work. it's not that bad as what the associate director told me about during the interview. the only down thing was, the nurse that i was shadowing was doing a lot of "bad habits" that i wished to see or pick-up during orientation. good thing is she isn't really my mentor. so now, i am just hoping (and praying) that my mentor won't have those "bad habits" and would be (somehow) meticulous on how she practices her nursing.

*********

i appreciate how elmhurst does their orientation.. eventhough it feels like nursing school once more, it paves the way. they don't just throw us on the floor, they make sure that we learn their policies and procedures, they make sure that our skills are up-to-date and they re-train us for the most part. to top it all, i am just really 10 minutes away from the hospital. i could always catch the 6:35 train and still be early for the 7 am shift. :)

**********

just got a call from timberland regarding my boots. ok, let me back track a little bit... i wore the boots when i went to my cpr class at the bronx. on our way home, the front part of it opened (i don't know if it's referred to as the "tongue" of the shoes). my brother mentioned to me that i could return my boots (even without the receipt!) to timberland and they can replace it. the following day, i called timberland and found out about how i can return/replace my boots. they gave me a return number, few weeks later my boots were on their way to timberland. so today, i got a call saying that they the boots were found defective unfortunately they don't manufacture that style of boots anymore. now, i could choose three styles among their selections and it has to amount to $115.

so far so good... i check out their site.. i see nothing. there is nothing on their site that i currently want to have. i want to have something similar to the boots that i got before... but since winter season is almost over, there are no more nice(r) boots. i really am not a big timberland person, but those boots that i have.. i really like them!!! it's like ugz but better (i don't mean to offend anyone who loves ugz!), it's not bulky at all and really comfy and warm and it doesn't make me look like i have Yeti's feet!! i got time though... and i do hope they release those style of boots preety soon again...

A Shout Out

2007-02-20T19:46:00.000-05:00

I just want to send a big THANK YOU to my sis for the book the she gave me - Postsecret!! It's really, really great! It's a compilation of secrets... although most of them are sad and depressing, but the artworks and the creativity that people who submitted these makes one think and ponder... again, thank you so much Achi!!! I really love it! :) [can't wait for the second book to come!]

A (Day Early) Valentine's Gift

2007-02-13T22:45:00.000-05:00

I got a call from 1-800-Flowers this morning stating they have a delivery for me and that they were at my place. I looked at Horacio with disbelief since we made a deal that we won't be getting each other anything for Valentine's Day. Though he insisted that the flowers are not a gift and that it was something else...

I came home and saw the we-missed-you notice, called the flower shop to request for it to be delivered tomorrow evening instead of morning. They notified me that delivery time varies and no specific time can be made. Few minutes after, I got a call from the delivery guy (same guy that called me this morning) and told me that they are on their way.

The doorbell rings, my heart jumped. I run as fast as my legs (with Bubbles in arm) as I could, reached the door and got my flowers with a teddy bear and chocolates. I ran back up to the apartment hoping that the vase didn't break and that water just spilled. Called Horacio and told him about the flowers being delivered and as I was reading the card that he left with the flowers, tears just came pouring. I know I have mentioned in my previous posts that I could get very emotional, but I never thought I could get that emotional over flowers. Actually, the message on the card got me really in the heart.

Anyways, here's a picture of the flowers, (a very plushy) bear and a boxful of chocolates taken with my camera phone (since mom has my camera!).

A better picture to come... hopefully. I am just so... happy, loved and spoiled. :)

A Week After..

2007-02-11T10:18:00.000-05:00

it has been a week since my orientation at elmhurst began. we have been good in making to orientation on time (even earlier!). the orientation process had made me realize how "grown-up" this new chapter of my life is. we were offered pension benefits, 401k, college fund (for you, your kids or anyone you wish for that matter). we had to go through health insurance packet and decide which health insurance we wish to apply for. during the first three days (when it was discussed in length!), i sat there and came home thinking that "wow, this is so grown-uppy. am i really ready for this?" it really was scary. this time options were laid out in front of me and i have to choose very wisely as for my future depends on it.

by the end of the week, we were sitting in class (yes, an 8am to 4:30pm lecture) and taking tests. the lectures are still as bad as we were in nursing school (long and boring) but come to think of it, we are actually getting paid to attend lecture. we have also been wearing scrubs, which makes getting ready for 'work' easier in the morning. i love scrubs!! they are so comfortable! to top it off - no walking around in those heels all day long!

the weekend rolled-in, i thought i would be getting those sleep until 11 in the morning. nope! my body is getting used to waking up early in the morning (7:30 am). i don't know if that sucks or not, i am just glad that my body is adjusting (slowly) and that the motivation is there.

i can't wait to be on the floor!! i am scared, nervous and excited all at the same time.

anyways... picture on me in my scrubs will be posted soon. this is so unusual for me... not taking a picture of me in scrubs... am i really growing up??? *ack*

Scrabble Marathon (Part 3)

2007-02-03T12:56:00.000-05:00

Another night was spent with friends. Horacio and I prepared dinner for eight people (including us) and once again, didn't have the appetite to eat the foods prepared with our own hands. It was enjoyed nonetheless, with more to take with them.

We played two rounds of Scrabble this time, only two since we started late. It was fun and intense game, the scores where so close to each other and people puting words that at first was amusing then was regretted since it was almost impossible to create new words.

It was fun, I enjoyed entertaining and cooking for friends. I look forward for more Friday (or any night possible) nights just hang out, enjoy each other's company and, of course, a good round of Scrabble (or Boggle, Monopoly, or movie marathon)!!

*****

Have to get going and pack my stuff for a sleepover at Staten Island. Yup, enjoying my social life the weekend before my nursing world dampens it! :)

Closing a chapter...

2007-01-31T20:25:00.000-05:00

Today was my last day at the lawfirm, where I have been working for six years, six months and two weeks. The night before, my brother and Horacio teased me about me crying as soon as I enter the office in the morning (that's how emotional I could get). I told them myself that I have a great feeling that tears won't be held back, since I have been in that firm for this long. I have celebrated my 18th and my 21st birthday there, I have gone from pre-braces, braces and post-braces, I have grown to know and love the people that I have worked with. Eventhough work there is stressful, the people that I have worked with made things easier to endure. Laughs and whispers were always heard amidst the crazy 8-line phone and difficult, aggravated clients.

I always thought of my last day at work and how would it go. Today, was not really different from any other day. Tears were almost shed but was able to compose myself. It is difficult to bid goodbye to those people who has seen you grow, who has challenged and pushed to do learn and do better, those people who listened to you when you needed help and/or advise, those people who took their time out to do you a favor.

It has been a good six years... to all who had been a part my life in that office, thank you. Please do keep in touch.

Check This Out!!!

2007-01-29T18:29:00.000-05:00

I got a call from a friend of mine, and she sent me this link... click here

yup!! that's me and horacio! hehehe

as the day goes...

2007-01-29T13:35:00.000-05:00

i am here at work... still got things to finish before i finally leave this place. somehow my brain refuses to concentrate on the task i have on hand. i am training a new person for the front desk, somehow that is going well. the personnel days, i have to finish but my brain just is not functioning well..

this is probably due to my lack of sleep (once more..), i was tossing and turning last night, playing with my DS hoping that it would tire my eyes, which didn't work. i don't know what's been bugging me lately... i am having this weird mood swings. is lack of sleep the sole reason? is there something else?

*sigh*

RIVERDALE

2007-01-28T23:28:00.000-05:00

January 27, 2007 my brother, Horacio, Cary and I left Queens at around 8:30 in the morning to attend a 10:30 am CPR class in Riverdale. A friend of mine provided us with concise instructions on how to there. As soon as we got to the 1/2 train platform, it was announced that 2 trains are running local, so I mentioned that we might as well take any train (since the plan was to take the 2 train, which was express, to 96th and transfer for the 1). We all hop on the train, Horacio and I taking turns with my DS and my brother and Cary looked at the map and stated that we have a long way to go to 231st. So we stayed on, not really minding the stops. After hours on the train and the announcement stating Intervale Avenue, I wondered how many stops more to go... so, I looked at the map and realize that we are on the the 2 line and it took us to the other side of Bronx. So, we all cheked out the map, decided to get off Gunhill Avenue and take a cab from there to our location. Gunhill station came, we all get off and out of the station. As soon as we were outside, we realized that hailing a cab is really out of the question. So, we tried to think of another plan. I checked out the bus map, since we were by the bus stop, hoping that there is a slightest chance that there's a Bx10 bus. After studying the map, I found out that we could take that bus (Bx28) to Montefiore Hospital and transfer for a Bx10. After a minute, the bus came, we all hopped in, Horacio made sure with the bus driver that we could transfer to Bx10 later. As soon as we got off at Montefiore, we tried to look for the station going to Riverdale when a guy came up to us and pointed it to us. Then we marched on our way and found ourselves by Golden Krust, where my brother graciously bought us beef patties before the bus came. When I saw a bus coming, I exclaimed to my brother that they have to hurry but then I realized that it was different bus, a lady then informed us that the bus we are waiting for is coming from the corner. She asked us where we were going and confirmed that we were waiting at the right post and that it is going to be a long way for us.

When the bus came, we got a call from our CPR instructor, she was already furious at us for we were late and were still 15 minutes away. We were counting stops by this time, since it felt like we were going to a different state, it was all uphill. By the time we got to our stop, we read the directions once more, this time there was the three of us reading it. After much discussion, we found ourselves in front of her door ringing her doorbell, got reprimanded once more.

After getting our certificates, we all found ourselves on the right path to the city once more. We all rewarded ourselves with Paul's Burger (the greatest burger I have ever had and for a really great price!!). Then Horacio and I went home for that much needed sleep, while my brother and Cary went to SoHo to get my brother's iPod.

I never thought that we would get lost as we did. The directions given to us was so clear, there were four of us. I guess no matter how good the map is, or how many heads there are when people aren't talking in the same language they really are bound to get lost. Now, I can imagine how people could still get lost with mapquest while having a navigator on the passenger side.

Lesson learned: never fully rely on anyone, if you must, still make sure that you, yourself, know where you are going; and, have everyone read the directions and know where you're going, especially if you know that you would be absorbed in playing tetris and/or reading a book.

funny!

2007-01-23T19:38:00.000-05:00

i may not know what their talking about, but this is really funny!

Opening New Doors

2007-01-18T18:11:00.000-05:00

As most of you have heard, I had landed a new job - as a Registered Nurse at Elmhurst Hospital at a geriatric medical-surgical unit. Yes, I said Elmhurst Hospital, the community hospital and I said geriatric unit. Orientation will begin on February 5th and will last for about 4 weeks. It will be 8am to 5pm each and everyday. Although I am kinda dreading it (since it's at 8 in the morning!), my consolation is that I get to wear street clothes and scrubs. Meaning, no more high-heeled boots, no more casual formal wear for me! Yes, I can be in my comfortable jeans and sneakers. In addition to that, I would be getting a hefty check come March. :)

There are a couple of factors why I accepted and wanted to work for Elmhurst. One of them is that it is very accessible to me (it's like, 10-15 minutes away via subway!). Elmhurst is one of the four hospitals in New York who has achieved MAGNET status. A hospital which has a MAGNET status next to their name says a lot about their nursing standard. I heard NYP-Columbia has been trying to attain that status but is failing to meet the standards (and Columbia is one of the great hospitals in New York). Then there's the eight-hour shift. Though we get to work five-day a week, it's still not that bad, especially if your schedule is from 3pm to 11:30pm. Just perfect for those people who can't get in the office at 9:30 am (ME!!), and it doesn't ruin your day or sleep cycle (since, I usually sleep around midnight anyways and enjoy waking up late in the morning). Then there's Elmhurst's 1 to 1.5% turnover rate, Elmhurst offering me the floor that I really wanted to work on, and the fact that I really don't feel like going through another nerve-wracking interview process. I got hired on the spot! Now, I just feel bad for my new white button down shirt since I never got the chance to wear it to an interview. Then again, the investment that I put in the blazer and the light blue button down shirt that I wore for the interview paid off. :) Did I mention that I would be wearing sneakers and scrubs? :)

Prior to handing in my resignation letter, I was shaking so bad. I was nervous for reasons I don't know until now. When I handed it in, my boss thought it was nothing but on then he looked at it again and said "Is this what I think it is? You're resignation letter?" and I meekly said "Yes." Then he went on saying how they will truly miss me when I am gone and that I have done an excellent job with the firm. He also asked if I knew anyone who could replace me and if I could show another co-worker of mine the ropes in publishing the newsletter. I admit, I almost cried when I was in his office. I know, I really hate myself for being sentimental! But, can you blame me? I have been for that firm for at least six years and seven months! I think that's a lot of time to spend in one place and not get attached! Then he asked me which hospital, unit I would be working on, followed by "Who's their recruiter? Can I have the recruiter or director's contact information?" Business as usual.

Then when the Office Manager saw the letter (she is off on Wednesdays, I left the letter on her desk), she called me and said "Halinan mo na gid kami?" (You're really leaving us?) followed by the usual questions - Where? Why at Elmhurst? How much?

It has been pretty weird ever since I handed in my resignation letter. Although they are still dumping work on me and I go home tired and lazy to get up in the morning, I still feel like a big burden has been lifted off my shoulders. I guess it's the knowing that I wouldn't be staying there for long and knowing that it is not just wishful thinking anymore. No matter how badly I have been wanting to get out of that place, I have learned and grew a lot in that office and I know a part of me will be really sad (and will be close to tears) when my last day comes. [For those reading this blog who had experienced working for that firm, or is still working there... don't make fun of me! I am a very sentimental person! hehehe]

Oh, I forgot to mention, Horacio also got the job at Elmhurst, we have the same schedule, although different floors. Now, Horacio and I are in the hunt for cheap scrubs and good sneakers or nursing shoes. :) We both can't wait to get our hefty checks this March! :) The day finally came, a new door is opening for me and Horacio. It's a new chapter in our lives.

Thank you to all of those who supported and put their faith on us. Most of all, we thank God for this blessing and the guiding us throughout the way.

Last Two Days of Year 2006

2007-01-03T11:09:00.000-05:00

The day of December 30th began with good brunch at Viand with Marichu, my brother, Horacio and Cary. After having our fill of pancakes, eggs, cornbeef hash, junior club sandwiches, coffee and orange juice, we all headed out to Central Park's Wollman Rink. With the crowd, we found ourselves a spot where we put on our (rental) skates and dumped our stuff in the locker, then it was time for the ice. Few seconds in the ice, Horacio blessed us with his graceful fall. Then it was off the ice for everyone since it was time for them to clean it. While waiting, we took tons of silly pictures and just enjoyed each others company, and talked about Horacio's little show for us (which Marichu caught in her camera!). A little while after that it was time for us to give the ice a second try. While Horacio and I waited for our friend (Mehak) to arrive, the rest went back. When Mehak arrived, the three of us headed to the ice (my brother already fell, taking a break because of his knee). Mehak helped Horacio out and later was moving inch by inch on the ice while doing a little dance of his. It was pretty funny helping Horacio out, there would be me, Marichu and Mehak helping him out and he still found a way to fall! By the time he reached a lap he was so ready to leave the ice and insisted that he just take our pictures. Few laps after that, I needed to rest, as everyone is at this point. Then we all decided to go back with Horacio, but as we reach the entrance to the ice, they whistled, it was time for the ice to be cleaned... once more. So, we just decided to leave and have some hot cocoa, since my brother's friend was already waiting for him outside the rink.

We then planned on having a late lunch, but decided against it. So we just walked around the area, until we spotted another diner. We went in and had some soup and desserts to warm us up. Then we all parted ways... Horacio and I had to head out to Bayside to meet with his cousins from North Carolina; my bro, his friend and Cary went to Astoria and Marichu went shopping at 34th Street.

On our long journey to Bayside, I fell asleep in Horacio's shoulders. It was such a long day, but it wasn't keeping me from seeing Horacio's cousins and his very adorable neice and nephew. When we got their place, Aidan (his one year old nephew) didn't take a long time to warm up to me and Horacio. The trick? Point a camera into his direction and give him gummi candies! Yes, Horacio and I came prepared with our gifts and candies. :) Few hours later, his cousin Sara(and her hubby, Rick) took us home. Kayla fell asleep on my lap...

After resting our tired feet and body, we were up again to do some grocery shopping for the next day.

December 31st, was spent most of the day in the kitchen preparing for New Year's Eve. It has been a "tradion"/superstition that one must have food on the table when ushering in the New Year (to be blessed with food the whole year round). We had Tito Vic and Ate over. Mom brought her ham! After twelve midnight, we all headed to my cousin's place with sangria and buko pandan on hand, and finding my cousin, two or her kids and Tita Neneng tipsy. We had another round of dinner at her place. Then afterwards, we were just chilling and then they put on the videoke... and few songs later we were on our way home.

Although I still missed the chaos that we experience back in Manila with the kids running around and all... it was surely a great experience and I enjoyed welcoming the New Year just as much.

So this is Christmas...

2006-12-25T23:12:00.000-05:00

although i slept last night (this morning) at 5 am... my body just makes me wake up early and get out of bed by 12. i wanted to stay in until 2 but my brother (who went to atlantic city with our cousins) insisted that i get up and see if mom was still in the other room (it was quiet this morning and no one was clammoring outside!).

since horacio wasn't able to spend christmas eve, he went directly from long island to my place. we had brunch (at 3:30pm) - corned beef, italian sausage, omelet and bush's beans and coffee, while watching the most depressing christmas movie i have ever seen "a christmas story". horacio and i then proceeded in opening our gifts. i had horacio open his gift first, after three layers of gift wrapper he then found his mets dvd (world series game). i know he's been wanting it but the price was a bit much, when a found a good price on it (below our $75 deal) i knew it would be the perfect gift. then i began to open mine. to my surprise i got the full season one and two of grey's anatomy!!! :) we then both realize that how weird it was that we both got each other dvds. hehehe

afterwards, we did a little online shopping at american eagle (50% off clearance items + 15% + free shipping.. you do the math!). when the order was placed, we planted ourselves in front of the tv and saw "the great raid". after the movie, we played two rounds of boggle (i won!) and a round of scrabble (i won!). i just love word games! hehehe

it has been a great holiday so far... can't wait for the new year's!! :)

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pictures are up on my multiply account!

before i sleep...

2006-12-25T05:10:00.000-05:00

look for me!! :)

Celebrating Christmas Eve

2006-12-25T04:09:00.000-05:00

This year's Christmas was celebrated at Manang Bing's place. I made my lasagna blognese (once more), eggnog (per my mom's request!), chocolate cheesecake candy bars and chicken pot pie (ok, this one was made by Horacio... let's just say it's one of his specialties!). The night was spent with good food, videoke (karaoke), tons of pictures (yes, we are camwhores!), Alizè (Wimberlie was right about this drink... it creeps up on you!), laughter and family. The mother was able to make it... hold on, I just remembered! I haven't had the ham that she made!!! uh-oh... and there would be non tomorrow... oh well, got to wait another year for that.

Anyways, Christmas may not be as chaotic as it is when spent in Manila but it is as equally good since it is also spent with family -- and at least, Christmas gift giving doesn't last three hours!! :)

For this Christmas... I have received the following items (from my family):

My bro got me the Boggle and the wooden stamp pad, mom got me the pink(!) sweater and sweat pants (do I really need to work-out that badly??), the frog is courtesy of the Sy family. Tito Boyet gave me $50!! The Bratz thing is a make-up set... this was an "accidental" gift, since the person who it was intended for was not around... by default it is given to anyone who wants it. I don't know what it is about with me this past few weeks... I just have the sudden urge to purchase make-up and the urge to apply it.. even if it's just an eye liner or eye shadow... but knowing myself, it's just a phase and it will pass... let's see how long this phase lasts this time! :)

I still have some more gifts to open tomorrow, including Horacio's. Speaking of whom, Horacio wasn't able to spend Christmas with us, since he plans on spending the New Year with yours truly! :) It's just fair... I guess. :) Anyways, he'll be here tomorrow and we'd both be opening more gifts! So, more pictures and blabbing to come! For now, it's time for me to hit the sack and call it a day... :)

Hope you enjoyed your Christmas, and let us not forget to count our blessings and be thankful for our Savior from up above! Have a blessed holiday everyone!! :)

Merry Christmas Cheers!!

2006-12-23T20:08:00.000-05:00

check me out -- MERRY CHRISTMAS!

check this out!!!

2006-12-21T22:30:00.000-05:00

after dinner date with friends and came home finding this by my place...

yes! that's JOHN LEGUIZAMO filming on MY block!!! :)

Hyper-Alert

2006-12-21T13:40:00.000-05:00

Peppermint Mocha + Diet Coke = Hyperactivtity

the solution for me to be up and about

Office Christmas Party

2006-12-19T18:18:00.000-05:00

earlier today, we celebrated the holiday season in our office. i thought it would be the usual lunch party, but it was a bit different, it was more fun. the food served was not the typical chinese food and pizza. we had (pork) barbecue, spare sibs, chicken, noodles, some dumplings, chorizo, salad. we also had some bottles of champagne.

after the gift giving by neil ($20 gift card from starbucks and au bon pain and almond roca chocolates) and the gift exchange. neil announced that beginning 2007 andy would be a partner of the firm. which was really a great news (it's about time!). andy has been with the firm for at least twenty years and really haven't taken much days off (i should know, i manage the personnel vacation days!). it was really good. then people made their holiday wishes for everyone, which took me by surprise since terry made sure that i give my own speech. it was weird... she introduced me as (once) the baby of the office and started at the age 17 (someone from the background said that i just turned 18!) and is now becoming a nurse (if only she knew...). i really couldn't think of anything to say, but i kinda felt sentimental, knowing that i spent a good six years with that company and i grew up alot from that office.

i guess i would really miss that office... no matter how crazy it could be in there. good memories were made, great friends that i met... great times. oh man, i can't believe i am getting all sentimental over that office!!

Letter to Santa

2006-12-18T13:43:00.000-05:00

I was going through U.S. Postal Service's website trying to find out something. This is really interesting... :)

check this link out... when the time comes, I could really "blackmail" my kid(s) into behaving themselves! :)

...... argh!

2006-12-17T01:22:00.000-05:00

here i am, the computer is positioned in such a way that i could surf while sitting on my bed (more comfy than my computer table swivel chair). my eyes were getting heavy earlier while i was reading (the time traveler's wife - really, really great book, must read!). eversince horacio left, i couldn't get myself to go to bed. i just wanna surf the net and try to stay up although i want to sleep and rest. i was planning on going out with my bro tomorrow, but as i predicted this morning (even before making the plans) i am feeling too lazy to go out.

it's weird, eversince we took the test and the review has ended, i thought i would have more energy and wouldn't be too tired. so far, nothing has changed. i leave worker later than supposed to be (my work sched is 9:30 to 4pm), get home pretty exhausted. it took so much effort for me to go out friday with horacio and finish christmas shopping. by the time we have checked everyone on our list, it took so much effort to not beg horacio to carry me up to the subway platform, and to our apartment. i landed on my bed as soon as we got home and everytime i tried to stand up my legs felt wobbly and seems to give in on me. i don't know what it is, but i am guessing that there is just too much things going on at work lately plus the (desperately) wanting to get an interview, be offered with a unit and hospital that i would love is just taking a toll on me. although i kinda am taking my time in applying since i am so scared of going into a "real" job interview. i just don't like interviews... i get too shy, my heart would start pounding which would cloud my brain and somehow slow down the synapses. (flashback of my first year highschool declamation!)

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lately, i also had been thinking of taking up culinary lessons. don't ask me why. i also wanna learn how to drive and have my own car (another don't ask me why). i also want to go on a trip, where? i don't know. anywhere. i guess, i was just so used on not being in new york during christmas and/or new year. i miss christmas (or any holiday/celebration) in manila. i miss the kids running around getting all excited for their gifts... i miss the chaos that surrounds us during christmas time. it's a happy kind of chaos that when you're there you'd wish everyone would stop and just keep quiet, yet you know if that happens it just won't be the same.

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planning on getting me gift but no clue what to get me? go to www.thethingsiwant.com and look up my name... :)

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it's getting cold and my body is asking for warmth... so i guess i am gonna try sleep now... hopefully, i wake up refresh in the morning with the will to go out and take in the outside world.

What's in the title?

2006-12-14T10:24:00.000-05:00

I know that it has been a couple of days since I found out that I had passed my board exams and that I am now officially a Registered Nurse. Somehow, it still feels surreal.

After taking it Saturday, I felt better, I knew I had a chance of passing it. The thing about taking the NCLEX is that there's is only a 50% of you passing it (and 50% of you failing it). It is not like any ordinary test that if you score 70 you're set. The test is computerized and there's and imaginary line wherein they start you with a question within that imaginary line. If you fail to answer the question correctly the computer would give you an easier one (below the line), if you are able to answer it correctly it'll give you a harder one (above the line - passing questions). The test could end at anytime. The minimum questions that one can take is 75 and the maximum number is 265. One can end the test at 75 and still be unsure of the results or end at 265 with the same uncertainties, or it could end between 75 and 265 and still have the same feelings about the test. As what a friend of mine said - if it takes this much explaination, then it must be really one heck of a test.

This time, I only not re-took my Kaplan course, but thanks to Horacio's research, also reviewed through Feuer. The difference between the two review course is that Kaplan is more on strategy and how to approach the questions, the Feuer is more content based with some strategy. Horacio and I loaded the Feuer cd lecture onto our ipods and reviewed intently each night of the week. We took Kaplan questions only and reviewed them together. This time we both really studied intently. I took the week of from work (saying that I would be attending a review from 8 am to 5 pm) before test, Horacio and I reviewed the day before, we both tested each other with all the lab values and explained to each other diseases that we couldn't fully comprehend. It really was a grueling review...

The morning of the test we brought sandwiches with us, since none of us could leave the test center to get some food and are only allowed two ten minute breaks. I almost wasn't able to take the test since I thought that National ID is the same as the Permanent Residence card -- thank God that they accepted my State ID. We both went in thinking that we are in for a 265 item test and not 75. We were both too anxious to eat the cream cheese and jelly bagel that we prepared earlier that morning. As soon as we checked-in, we both went to the restroom, upon coming back to the test center, our number was called and we both were in the same room. It was nerve wrecking!!! I had to relax and note to myself that I am there for a 265 item test and to just take one question at a time and there's no rush I got six hours to do the test.

Twenty questions came and went. I got stuck with a calculation problem (which I gave up and just guessed, since it was starting to rattle my nerves). Question 65 came and had to take a restroom break.. I came back and told myself that I have 200 more to go and have enough time. Then question 71 came, tried to calculate in my head that I have around 190 questions to go... then suddenly my computer stopped. It just gave me blank screen.. told myself okay maybe it's just taking it's time.. then a survey came up I knew that was the end of it. I took the survey, raised my hand... looked over where Horacio was sitting and realized he was done before I did.

We met up by Starbucks (our meeting place), and we discussed how we felt about it, we both were hoping for a 265 test... but we both ended with 75. We came home with the same number of sandwiches and two or three less apple juice.

Sunday came and went.... went to work Monday, Horacio calls me few minutes past ten, elated. HE PASSED! He had to much of an energy, called everybody he knows and telling them the great news. Here I was sitting at work deciding whether to check my results or not. Spoke with Horacio told me against checking the results on-line while at work for it may lead to me handing in my resignation letter. Went home, still trying to think whether to check or not... finally giving in. I checked with my eyes closed shut and Horacio telling me to click the button. When I finally did, Horacio let out a big whoop! WE BOTH PASSED! It was unreal!! My brother came home few minutes after that, I told him the news and he was happy.

I called my mom, tried to prepare her for a bad news. When I told her the news she let out a loud shriek which scared the customer that she was helping out. Then we could our sister told her the news... then I called my dad. He was in the factory cafeteria reading his newspaper. When I told him the news, he didn't let out a loud shriek... but I knew he was happy for me. I almost was in tears. He told me that I made his December, Christmas, a very happy one. When I asked him what my gift is for passing the test... he told me all the flip-flops that I want. My brother, Horacio and I just started laughing. I told him I want all the colors and prints, and he said I got it. My sister (few days later) told me that my was too happy that he bought everyone in the factory lunch - chickenjoy (man, I wish I had some...). We called more people bearing the news. Of course, we had to call Tito Vic, he was also happy for me. Few days later I got a heartwarming e-mail from him.

It still feels surreal, but like what everybody said, I deserved it. Having an RN title after my name still feels a little bit weird, but I deserved it and would provide the best care that I am capable of.

it's official....

2006-12-11T19:58:00.000-05:00

I PASSED THE NCLEX AND NOW A REGISTERED NURSE!!!!

All the hardwork paid off... thank you to all those who supported and prayed for me, you know who you are guys... THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!!

Christmas Cheers

2006-12-11T17:22:00.000-05:00

Upon moving to our new apartment we knew that we won't be able to hold big gatherings (just like when I celebrated my 23rd birthday). My friends had been wanting to see my new place, I decided to throw a Christmas Party for us. Due to space availability, I made sure to keep it small. Since I can't have all of my friends over, I decided to throw one just for my friends from school, and another one for my friends from work. I thought it owuld be a nice thing to do as well... I love get togethers and it's not everyday that we get to hang-out.

After planning menus with Horacio, sending out evite (setting up a day which most of our friends are free) and thinking up of a way to do gift exchange (making sure that each one gets home with a gift), the day finally arrived. Horacio and I did the grocery Friday afternoon and I spent the whole night Saturday and whole morning Sunday preparing and cooking.

We had Lasagna Bolonese, Swedish Meatballs (minus jelly), Buffalo Wings, Spicy Rice with Shrimp, Chicken Macaroni Salad, Ceasar's Salad, and a Pumpkin Pie and Chocolate Cheesecake -- all of which are made by yours truly with help from Horacio (okay, the salad was store bought...). We also had a chocolate fountain running (had banana, apples, marshmallow and pretzels to dip into it) which was absolutely a hit! Horacio also made Sangria which made the beer and spiked eggnog go to waste...

After catching up, exchanging life's stories, (the usual...) gossip, Horacio prayed for the food and everbody dug in. We also celebrated Dave's birthday with the Chocolate Cheesecake, was so glad that he was able to make it. As instructed, everybody brought their unisex gifts (I got a lot of complains from this actually...) and we picked-out names and whoever we got, that would be the person who we gave the gift to. Everybody went home with a gift, a full belly, more food for their trip home and a great time.

I actually felt good about the party. It was spent with good friends and good food. I am also proud of myself for being able to pull through and make good food. This was the first party that I planned and prepared, it was nerve wracking thinking if the food would be good knowing that I made it all from scratch and no plan b. Special thanks to Horacio for helping me out in the kitchen especially during the times when I was panicking! To my brother who figured out how to make the space bigger and for the great pictures that he took.

Back In The Kitchen

2006-12-10T02:24:00.000-05:00

After a week of me staying clear from the kitchen (due to bad cold, cough, sore throat), I am once again cooking. Today has been a pretty long day... my body was so used to being up at 10am (for this past week) but today I woke up at 6:45 am, been cooking (and baking) since five, and is supposed to be in bed by now (as promised to Horacio), yet here I am... blogging.

Cooking has been another outlet for me eversince. I know, it doesn't really show since I am still this small (good genes? metabolism?). Anywho... my earliest recollection of cooking was my Ammah (that's what we call our grandma in my dad's side) would watch "Wok with Yan" a Chinese cooking show. I remember my grandma dropping whatever she is doing just to watch this show. I think I was around five then... Then we moved to Iloilo, Lola (my mom's mom) would forbade us (me) to come close to the kitchen. But what she doesn't know (or does she?) is that our cook would let me in the kitchen and let me help her. She would give me the smallest, safest knife that she had and would teach me how to cut vegeteables a certain way for a certain dish. When we would hear my Lola approaching I would drop the knife and ran to the back pretending to be playing with my clay pots and pans (I know, she forbade me in the kitchen, but she allowed me to have clay pots...).

I really don't know which/what really inspired me into cooking... but whatever it was... I am glad that it happened. One of these days I actually plan into applying to one of those culinary schools just for the heck of it. :) For now, it'll just be Food Network channel.

I Finally Got It!!!

2006-12-08T22:09:00.000-05:00

my timberland jacket that is!! :) although i originally wanted to get the beige one, i decided to buy it black though, since i plan to wear it mostly when it rains/snow and knowing how clumsy i could get....

was out the whole week from work, where it was delivered. then horacio arrived this morning (after making me believe that he went to the gym and all) bringing a timberland bag with my jacket in it!!! i was so happy!!! :) the jacket just came in time for the REALLY freezing weather! :)

2006-11-27T19:08:00.000-05:00

Isis

Honorable, straightforward and idealistic. Active and self-confident.

Colors: male: white, female: blue
Compatible Signs: Osiris, Thoth
Dates: Mar 11 - Mar 31, Oct 18 - Oct 29, Dec 19 - Dec 31

Role: Goddess of motherhood, women, and magic; goddess of the South; protector of Imseti (the son of Horus who watched over the canopic jar containing the liver)
Appearance: Woman wearing the hieroglyph for "throne" on her head

What is Your Egyptian Zodiac Sign?
Designed by CyberWarlock of Warlock's Quizzles and Quandaries

2006-11-27T14:24:00.000-05:00

Can anyone tell me why there is such law?

Happy Pumpkin Pie Day!! :)

2006-11-22T23:59:00.000-05:00

i know thanksgiving day is all about the turkey. i still am an amateur about this things and slowly (really slowly!) trying to get into the turkey-thanksgiving day thing. since we really don't celebrate thanksgiving in philippines. and the fact that i am still scared even with the thought of roasting/basting/stuffing a 20 lb turkey (we got it for free then i gave it away!).

anyways, as my first attempt to make something that is known for thanksgiving - pumpkin pie. after pumpkin-cream cheese splashing all over my kitchen counter top (which i think bubbles enjoyed!) here is the result of my hard labor...

isn't it gorgeous? delicious looking? i know.. this was actually my second attempt. the first one came out okay too but this one the better looking one.

too bad my sous chef (yes, horacio is usually my sous chef) is not around. no one was there to look after my work and take pictures of me as i make my first pumpkin pie... as he did when i made my first fruit tart (see previous post).

anyways, (pat-on-my-shoulder) i did a pretty good job. i now just hope that i tastes delish as it looks. horacio's family and aunts will be the judge of this.... crossing my fingers, hoping for a good review!!!

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going to poconos in a couple of hours with the familia. HAPPY THANKSGIVING EVERYONE!!! :)

....

2006-11-21T10:57:00.000-05:00

Sometimes I don't get people. Why do people love to put blame? Why do they love twisting stories? Why do they rather listen to someone else rather than go to the main source and find out themselves? Why do people love to put someone down? What gain do this people get? What satisfaction do they obtain from someone else's downfall? Why can't they accept that they are at fault as well?

In My Own World

A New Chapter

utmost compliment?

Family Affair

from my kitchen to..

so, it's been a while...!

par-tay!

wedding-mania

communication

ramblings...

Merry Christmas!!!

Crazy Two Days!

days vs. nights

what to do...

is the grass really greener on the other side?

i am officially 26!

A Tribute to Pablo.

me likey...

help!

*GASP*

I Bid Adieu

Care Package

on the job market

updates.. updates.. updates...

another sleepless night...

On Being Engaged

On The Day of Hearts

back from the warmth...

Warmth please.....

Four Things

So Cute!!!

A Christian-filled Saturday

My Five Days Off Work...

The Day I Turned 25

It's Official!!

hmmm...

a dilemma...

need to breathe..

Please watch these.... and pass it on!

A Weekend In Boston

Full Force Crew

i should...

the weekend...

health update..

shoesies... shoesies.. shoesies...

on calling in...

for mom...

Hilarious!!!

The Sunshine State

argh!!

two and a half days...

days... weeks... months...

sad talaga...

thoughts...

You've Got to Watch This!!!

the weekend that was...

Memorial Day in Coney Island

HELP!!!!

it's official...

My New Toy!!

Happy Nurses Week

first day off orientation

on being a nurse.

to get or not to get... that is the question.

life.

brain diarrhea... (no pun intended)

made me all giddy inside...

what's been happenning...

A Shout Out

A (Day Early) Valentine's Gift

A Week After..

Scrabble Marathon (Part 3)

Closing a chapter...

Check This Out!!!

as the day goes...

RIVERDALE

funny!

Opening New Doors

Last Two Days of Year 2006

So this is Christmas...

GASP